umbilicalbiotch

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Umbilicalbiotch's favorite FMLs

By kewlio45 - 01/07/2009 06:33 - United States

Today, the dentist sneezed in my mouth. FML

agreeclassic 108 019

vote type 1 6 336

By ZZ - 30/06/2009 03:01 - Canada

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

agreeclassic 15 573

vote type 1 66 805

By Anonymous - 29/06/2009 19:52 - United States

Today, my parents booked my 18th birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's. FML

agreeclassic 432

vote type 1 49

What are you doing ear?

By JK710 - 23/06/2009 01:13 - United States

Today, I discovered that the hearing in my left ear is still good. I haven't been able to hear that well out of it for 2 weeks and I thought I popped an eardrum and waited for it to heal. I stuck a Q-Tip in there to clean it out. Turns out there was actually a dead fly in my ear. For 2 weeks. FML

agreeclassic 59 264

vote type 1 11 432