tigercat625

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Tigercat625's favorite FMLs

Excuuuuuuse me?

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 13:32 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

agreeclassic 55 557

vote type 1 11 526

By woodless - 09/12/2012 15:29 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

agreeclassic 33 146

vote type 1 1 962

By td1078 - 24/05/2012 15:50 - United States - Rockville

Today, I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handed him one. His mom rushed over, pried it out of his hands, threw it away, and yelled, "She's filthy, don't use that." FML

agreeclassic 31 888

vote type 1 3 151

td1078 app_comment_confession_title

td1078 2

Thursday 24 May 2012 20:44

I wrote this FML story and for the record I was in a suit and heals, with my hair and makeup done, as i was on my home from the office. The woman was just a B. More than anything it was funny because she was so hysterical over a seemingly innocent gesture.

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 10:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML

agreeclassic 35 195

vote type 1 8 186

By sadkid - 25/09/2011 23:23 - United States

Today, my mom called me a bastard, told me I should run away, and said I don't deserve to live in her house. All because I didn't use a plate when I ate a Poptart. FML

agreeclassic 34 914

vote type 1 4 400