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By anon - 25/07/2013 04:44 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, one of my coworkers asked if I hated my life and was depressed because of how I look most of the time. This is just my facial expression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 197

You deserved it 5 006

By Anonymous - 17/07/2013 16:02 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 858

You deserved it 54 926

Wish list

By Anonymous - 22/05/2009 02:45 - United States

Today, while cleaning out a closet with my mother, I found a wish list from when I was five. On that list, I wished my parents would divorce. Not only did that seriously hurt my mom, but now she thinks I'm the devil because my wish came true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 496

You deserved it 12 875

By dcait_1196 - 16/10/2010 13:14 - France

Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 203

You deserved it 4 438

By Anonymous - 12/05/2011 07:54

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 529

You deserved it 5 702

By anonymous - 07/03/2010 19:20 - United States

Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend is getting engaged. He broke up with me five months ago because our relationship was too serious for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 937

You deserved it 2 777

By a-scared - 06/08/2009 22:18 - United States

Today, I went to the Grand Canyon with my family. Also today, I found out that I have a crippling fear of heights. My family left me on a ledge hyperventilating and having a mental breakdown, while they hiked for another 2 hours. They won't stop telling me how pretty it was and what I missed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 681

You deserved it 8 666

By unfortunate419 - 17/02/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 465

You deserved it 2 722

By Anonymous - 10/01/2015 13:45 - United States

Today, my fiancée got married. I did not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 828

You deserved it 3 446

By imy - 18/10/2011 15:01 - United States

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 166

You deserved it 9 476

By Mikaela - 01/06/2012 03:25 - United States

Today, I saw my reflection in the computer screen and I thought I looked quite nice. I tried to take a screenshot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 874

You deserved it 31 409

By NikkiiFireStarter - 20/10/2009 10:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my 10 year-old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including a £600 guitar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 127

You deserved it 2 938

By MissyPants - 15/08/2015 08:22 - United States - Lebec

Today, my husband decided he would rather be with his mistress than with me while I gave birth to our first child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 603

You deserved it 2 476

MissyPants tells us more.

MissyPants 11

Sunday 16 August 2015 10:04

I am the op of this FML and I hope it shows that but let me explain this a little further. My soon to be ex husband has been cheating on me for the last few months of my pregnancy. I noticed the changes in him but I hoped it was just nerves over the baby. I actually caught him about three weeks before I went into labor and threw him out. I had planned on letting him be there when I gave birth to our baby girl but he didn't answer my calls. My mother was with me so I wasn't alone but I really thought he would want to see the birth of his first child. I have filed for divorce and have no problem being a single parent. He makes me physically ill at the moment but I have tried to be civil for our babies sake. I want him to be in her life because she deserves a dad but I can't force him to be one. I'm thrilled to be a mom no matter the circumstances and me and my daughter will be ok no matter what. Thank you all for the funny, sweet, and even mean comments; they make my day a little better.

By Anonymous - 27/07/2015 12:58 - United States - Newtown Square

Today, I found out my pregnant sister has been watching Teen Mom 2 to find out how to be a good parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 074

You deserved it 2 258

By skc - 14/03/2009 11:36 - United Kingdom

Today, I gave myself a facial with one of those masks you leave on for a while. I busied myself by tidying my room while it dried and eventually forgot all about it. I finally remembered about it after I answered the door to the postman. Not embarassing enough? I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 382

You deserved it 65 065

By cane - 05/03/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, my mom needed coffee so I drove to Starbucks to get her some. She let me drive the Porsche, which has never happened. Upon coming home I picked the coffee up out of the cupholder so it wouldnt spill. My phone vibrated in my pocket, I spilled the coffee and crashed the car into the garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 209

You deserved it 65 510

By Goth_Hawk - 13/01/2015 08:23 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found myself wondering if my sister's jaw makes the same clicking sound when she's giving head as it does when she's eating food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 178

You deserved it 8 924

Goth_Hawk tells us more.

Goth_Hawk 28

Tuesday 13 January 2015 18:18

I'm OP, she does have a jaw issue, and the doctors have said they would have to break her jaw to fix it. I thought about it because it was 3am and the thought of her chewing came to mind as I was reading some of the dirtier submissions on FML. It was so jarring that I had to post it.

By smeeagain - 21/10/2011 01:17 - United States

Today, I was chaperoning at my local high school's Homecoming dance. Outside the gym, I saw some kids drinking, so I walked over to stop them. One of them promptly spun around and punched me in the mouth. I had my ass handed to by a drunk 9th grader. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 528

You deserved it 6 385