Intimacy: Whaaaaat? - FML

Whaaaaat?

By erphy21 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Lompoc

Today, my 18 year-old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 294

You deserved it 6 389

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/10/2014 16:09 - Norway - Egersund

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 329

You deserved it 6 072

By fucked by sex ed - 29/03/2013 17:18 - United States - Manchester

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 899

You deserved it 17 024

Bad grandparenting

By Anonymous - 24/12/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 372

By Anonymous - 04/05/2016 14:15 - United Kingdom - Saint Austell

Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 797

You deserved it 2 883

By Erica - 09/12/2018 13:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, not only did I find out that my 13 year-old daughter is pregnant, I found out that she did it on purpose "to prove that she’s responsible." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 571

You deserved it 710

Kids these days…

By Anonymous - 08/10/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent a good few minutes watching my wife thrash our son with a pillow because despite all our warnings to him about safe sex, he and his girlfriend are going to be parents in about 6 months, and they’re both 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 120

By aprouddaddy - 04/12/2014 23:46 - France - Paris

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 871

You deserved it 6 594

Yeet it

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 05:00

Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 373

You deserved it 1 188

She'll learn

By alyssa - 01/04/2021 21:30

Today, my four-year-old daughter believes that all women will automatically become pregnant at some point during their lives. At least we don’t have to save for college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 1 458

By bummed - 04/11/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, I found out a 6-month pregnant woman is claiming my boyfriend to be the father. Even though this would have been previous to our relationship, he already has two kids from getting girls pregnant in high school. I guess he didn't learn his lesson the first two times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 215

You deserved it 16 659

Next

Top comments

zharks1010 18

Sunday 27 September 2015 15:29

Your son is a dumbass

pokemyeyes 23

Sunday 27 September 2015 15:30

#facepalm

Comments

BluePeace2017 8

Wednesday 7 October 2015 2:46

um... maybe you should've taught your son about real life???

Ferry043 8

Thursday 8 October 2015 19:12

Did he learn it.. the hard way?

MyFairLady 6

Sunday 18 October 2015 16:29

Does that mean he got a girl pregnant?

Matteo_G 16

Monday 19 October 2015 14:30

your son is pretty stupid but i feel like this one is pretty deserved. it's up to parents to make sure their sons' sexual education isn't as bad as this one

GeorgiaBea 28

Thursday 5 November 2015 1:22

I feel like there was a life lesson he may have missed. As a parent, it's kinda your job to teach them those things... I knew about sex long long before I ever did it, and was able to make informed, healthy choices.

antihero3391 2

Monday 7 December 2015 8:50

for science!

fantasyworld 37

Saturday 26 December 2015 20:03

We really need better sex education.

KayleeFrye 39

Monday 8 February 2016 20:57

I'm sorry your child is an idiot. Maybe you should have done a better job teaching him about sex.

123Puppy 33

Tuesday 13 August 2019 20:15

You should’ve given him the talk.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my daughter had to deal with a Karen at her job, lost her temper, and punched her unconscious just to shut her up. Sounds like a good thing, right? Wrong, she pressed charges, got my daughter arrested, and she’s now facing years in prison for grievous bodily harm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 299

You deserved it 1 375

Today, I got tipped more than I have in my bank account. It was $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 027

You deserved it 6 188

Today, I was hit by a car. I called my girlfriend from the hospital and asked her if she could pick me up. She responded by saying "Fuck you, you aways tell me what to do!" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 397

You deserved it 10 389

Today, yet again. my boyfriend told me I'm getting fat, even after I told him to stop and that it's affecting my mental health. I had an eating disorder previously, and now I'm thinking about going back to just eating an apple a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 304

You deserved it 231

Today my boyfriend tried to be sexy and rip off my underwear. Instead, he bit a chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 135

You deserved it 451

Today, I was driving home from college when I saw a couple of sporty chicks jogging on the side of the road. I honked at them and yelled suggestively as I do at college, which usually gets a fun flirty reaction from college girls. It was my next-door neighbor and her 11 year old daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 523

You deserved it 56 719