Health: Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while...

By Anonymous - 13/10/2010 02:09 - United States

Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML

agreeclassic 7 396

vote type 1 66 487

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By Anon - 12/01/2012 19:24 - United States

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

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Pissed

By TJ. - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

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By Amy - 10/05/2012 19:14 - Canada - Prince George

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

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By nosleep - 05/02/2011 00:05 - Australia

Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

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Hiking is fun

By Harry - 29/11/2009 22:53 - United States

Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad, so we went to the edge of a cliff to relieve ourselves. He peed and it came and hit me in the face. He did it on purpose, so I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML

agreeclassic 17 548

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With friends like these…

By marz88 - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

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By JohnFarrell - 24/04/2009 17:20 - United States

Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML

agreeclassic 14 528

vote type 1 66 060

By Anonymous - 05/09/2014 21:37 - Sweden - Ume

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

agreeclassic 17 967

vote type 1 41 655

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

agreeclassic 30 066

vote type 1 3 386

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

agreeclassic 37 830

vote type 1 7 813

DearCricket 0

Wednesday 13 October 2010 9:10

Instant Karma :)

dragonaair 5

Wednesday 13 October 2010 9:07

You deserve it, asshole.

Comments

dianka_koxanka 0

Thursday 14 October 2010 10:06

haha fail

Killerkorpse 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 10:36

Lmao you got what you deserved lmao

jjb97 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 1:50

u desirved it u were being a jackass to him

thekidownz 0

Monday 25 October 2010 7:11

lol ur pretttttyyyyyyyu

dansco 24

Tuesday 1 February 2011 6:06

Hope it hurt!

nick3600 22

Saturday 5 March 2011 1:30

LOL U GOT PWN3D ****** EPIC FAIL

OriginalPooh01 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 3:40

Hahaha that's what you get!

akvandervort 21

Thursday 29 September 2011 5:11

Did he pee his pants?

Miss_Mandi 29

Thursday 21 June 2012 0:36

Prank gone wrong. YDI. And, if he's your friend, how didn't you know he's a light sleeper o.0

Kyna_Bitch 16

Thursday 13 February 2014 21:47

Your friend isn't an idiot or maybe he just wasn't fully sleeping haha

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Today, I found out just how painful it is to get a cramp in your penis in the middle of sex, especially when your wife is on top and just has to keep going for a few more thrusts because she's so close to finishing. FML

agreeclassic 1 075

vote type 1 188

Today, it was my engagement party. All was going fabulously, until my fiancé's dad decided to give us a toast, and completely forgot my name in front of all my family and friends. I've been with his son for 7 years. FML

agreeclassic 36 081

vote type 1 3 133

Today, despite being 22 and having near-perfect dental hygiene, I was diagnosed with receding gums and can only eat soft food for the rest of my life. Then the dentist told me that this typically only happens to people over fifty who don’t take care of their teeth. FML

agreeclassic 2 878

vote type 1 266

Today, I went to hospital for a potential stomach bug. According to a CT scan, I also found out that I have uterine fibroids as well. Yay for being a woman. FML

agreeclassic 836

vote type 1 112

Today, after spending five years regaining contact with my estranged father, I finally met him. I tearfully dropped my luggage and ran to hug him. He belched and told me to get in the car, because he had diarrhea. FML

agreeclassic 27 608

vote type 1 2 646

Today, my nose was really stuffy. I heard somewhere that inhaling tea steam clears up the nose. While reading a magazine I inhaled my cup of green tea steam, without knowing that slowly I was moving my cup closer to my nose. Hot tea was sucked into my left nostril and burned the inside badly. FML

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vote type 1 35 920

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