Nobody wants to dance with me By Lewis - 24/01/2019 00:30 I really don't understand why... I agree, your life sucks 254 You deserved it 136 Share Tweet Share
Today, my Marine friend got back from his tour of duty overseas. We went out for drinks to celebrate his return. His own form of celebration was to pick a fight with a returning Navy SEAL and his friends. We lost. Badly. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 374 You deserved it 14 147
Today, after a busy afternoon taking care of the kids, I was feeling really down about only being a mom these days, and I was hoping my husband would make me feel better when he got off work. In the middle of cuddling, he called me "mom." FML I agree, your life sucks 24 838 You deserved it 4 017
Today, I was playing hide and seek with a few friends. I hid in the bathroom, under the sink in a cabinet. I ended up having to sit there quiet as a mouse while my grandfather took an incredibly long and vile dump. I was too afraid to move. Let's just say he didn't rush it. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 374 You deserved it 9 874
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 102 You deserved it 5 971
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML I agree, your life sucks 45 338 You deserved it 8 738
Today, I realised that whenever I make eye contact with a stranger, I yawn. I work at a McDonald's FML I agree, your life sucks 881 You deserved it 165
That's the best dance ever 😍
Fierce! rawrrr!