Students, Education and Animals: Higher learning

Higher learning

By jaybob18 - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally used the statistics book that I forked out $120 to buy. To kill an ant. FML

agreeclassic 28 751

vote type 1 11 448

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By toothbreaker - 22/08/2019 11:00 - United States - Tucson

Today, I bought my very first college textbook. I received a stack of hole-punched papers. My $195 "book" isn’t even bound together. FML

agreeclassic 1 856

vote type 1 195

By romainmain - 16/09/2012 22:50 - France - Charleville-m?zi?res

Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it straight to the insect afterlife by smashing it with a book. The book crushed it, and caused my clock to come free from the wall and crash down onto my TV. FML

agreeclassic 12 939

vote type 1 26 605

By futuregigolo - 22/12/2012 00:11 - United States - Strasburg

Today, I went to the local used books store to sell all my college textbooks. I spent several hundred dollars on them in total. I ended up walking out of the shop a pathetic $3.50 richer. FML

agreeclassic 33 985

vote type 1 7 683

By Cougar - 24/07/2009 19:05 - United States

Today, I was at work when my mother called. She gave me great news that she had finally cleaned out my room and all those "old and useless" books that I had in there. Those "useless" books that she had just trashed were all antiques and worth about $500 each. There were 27 books in there. FML

agreeclassic 58 742

vote type 1 5 220

By Anonymous - 05/06/2017 22:00

Today, I woke up early to weird scratching and smacking noises. After gathering enough courage to check what it was, I found out it was just an ant stuck on a piece of paper. FML

agreeclassic 2 223

vote type 1 347

By Blood on my hands - 07/08/2013 05:40 - United States

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

agreeclassic 53 175

vote type 1 25 761

New neighbors

By Jules - 06/07/2023 10:00 - Germany

Today, I got up, curtains still closed, and in the dim light noticed something dark on the floor, which wasn’t there yesterday. I turned on the light to find out what it was. A tiny ant hill. FML

agreeclassic 734

vote type 1 130

By QWERTY - 03/04/2011 23:20

Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML

agreeclassic 33 200

vote type 1 18 262

By Anonymous - 22/11/2010 02:51 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that my cat had knocked over a $35 can of powdered baby formula, and there were TWO different colonies of ants warring over the bounty all over the counter. FML

agreeclassic 24 885

vote type 1 4 173

By YeahItsmecoolhuh - 17/02/2011 06:50 - United Arab Emirates

Today, I found a horde of ants in one of my socks when I put it on my foot. FML

agreeclassic 34 568

vote type 1 4 994

LetItRise 0

Friday 17 June 2011 15:52

stuff like that grinds my gear, teachers that don't use the god damn text book Fyl

moshimoshi1993 8

Friday 17 June 2011 16:34

Or that the ant is a statistic. 34% of ants die each year in unused text book accidents.

Comments

happychicka 0

Friday 21 October 2011 4:48

Squash it under your foot genius!!! Gosh not so hard to do!

Steffi 26

Tuesday 7 May 2013 17:11

Why did you have to kill an ant?

ProtoPrime 7

Wednesday 11 December 2013 4:43

There are worse bugs ya know

rservidone78 2

Thursday 3 April 2014 20:15

Pest control probably cost more so i wouldnt worry

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 20 August 2014 11:29

Well it worked didn't it? Now what will you use on a spider? A book worth 160? 20$ a leg?

fantasyworld 37

Thursday 2 April 2015 12:16

It's annoying how professors make you buy textbooks but you never use it.

great_nate 26

Saturday 12 November 2016 22:59

$120? You're lucky! Mine was $300 because they went to a new edition. Like anything changed in statistics.

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Today, I found out the real reason I always had trouble making/keeping friends as a kid and why I wasn’t invited to anything. My parents were aggressive swingers and either successfully fucked, or came on to, every couple wherever we moved. Thanks, you horny bastards. FML

agreeclassic 434

vote type 1 86

Today, I started my new job at a haunted house. I figured I'd change clothes when I got home, since my bloody shirt and zombie makeup were blatantly just an outfit. I barely made it 10 minutes before I was pinned to the ground at gunpoint, cuffed, and needing new underwear. FML

agreeclassic 28 277

vote type 1 2 896

Today, I was laying down on my couch. My friend IM's me on my laptop to watch a video. It turned out that the video was one of those scary pop up's. I got so scared I dropped my laptop. The screen had a big crack. FML

agreeclassic 46 536

vote type 1 10 673

Today, it's been a week since my family moved from a city to a house we inherited out in the middle of nowhere. It's horrible! There's wild animals everywhere, my dad says I have to help take care of the house now, it's a thirty minute ride to school, there's no sidewalks, and I hate it here! I want to go back! FML

agreeclassic 346

vote type 1 625

Today, my boyfriend and I saw someone dump a dog in our neighborhood before driving off. We spent an hour trying to get the dog out of the cold, but couldn't catch it. Temperatures go down to the 30s in 3 days. Hopefully we can catch it by then. FML

agreeclassic 815

vote type 1 96

Today, I talked to my husband about his lack of interest in sex. Apparently his definition is polar to mine; his is along the lines of cuddling. Not only did I wait until marriage to have sex with this man, apparently he prefers a permanent roommate without benefits. FML

agreeclassic 55 809

vote type 1 11 233

Higher learning

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