Love Today, my girlfriend replied a text message during sex. FML - FML

loawe - 11/04/2016 06:25 - Australia - Page

Today, my girlfriend replied a text message during sex. FML

4

1

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML

36 993

2 606

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

27 451

11 395

Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud, I told my boyfriend. Instead of congratulating me, he got mad that my work hours include Saturday, his laundry day. FML

32 110

4 249

Today, I got those stickers that say "Voice Activated; Say Loudly: PAPER TOWEL NOW!" I then placed one in a public bathroom and waited in the stall to hear someone yell the phrase. I waited for thirty minutes and heard the machine go off several times, with no shouting at all. In other words, no one fell for it. FML

100

1 613

Today, I was making one of those microwavable pizza kits. Realizing I had no crushed red pepper to put on it, my mom suggested using a chili pepper she had dried. Thinking it was a great idea, I cracked it open on my pizza and out popped some fuzzy white mold and two maggots. FML

1 698

267

Today, my boyfriend has spent all morning claiming there’s nothing to do when it’s raining outside. Sex is always an option, but he’s missed all my hints, including stripping naked and kissing him, because he thought I was on my way to get a shower instead of trying to fuck him. FML

2 072

624