Education

Hey everyone! OP here. Just registered my account.Thank you so much for your comments.. Yes I know it's good that they care... but it also was quite embarassing... As to better handcuffs, I've learnt my lesson.. No more cheap deals from ebay!

By Anonymous - 17/10/2013 13:43 - United States - Romulus

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 868

You deserved it 4 743

By jgw - 07/04/2017 00:00

Today, I was certain that over the six years of struggling through my Ph.D., I had culminated in one truly original idea. Until I saw it published in another thesis, from 1953. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 778

You deserved it 694

Controlling

By Future kept man, going cheap FML - 09/06/2022 04:00

Today, my mom was helping me plan for going to college. After 30 minutes of me getting more upset, and her getting more frustrated, she directed me to Tinder, a wedding venue website, and the local address for Planned Parenthood. Her actual words were, "There's no shame in being a stay at home dad these days." FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 190

Oh no…

By Augh. - 09/10/2009 02:30 - United States

Today, I discovered that the school I transferred from last year is closing. All the people that I so happily escaped from and left behind at that school will now be flocking to my new school senior year. Faaaantastic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 359

You deserved it 3 651

Moral quandary

By Anonymous - 26/10/2023 15:02 - United States - San Diego

Today, I realized some of my English students have just been going to their Philosophy professor to help them complete their essays. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312

You deserved it 113

ALIENS!

By Anonymous - 08/08/2024 09:00 - Australia

Today, I had to give a presentation on ancient civilizations. As a joke, my friend dared me to do the whole thing using puppets, which I thought it would be hilarious. Halfway through, I noticed the look on my professor's face and my classmates giggling. My professor has a phobia of puppets and I was the only one unaware of this fact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 171

Dungeons and dragons

By Anonymous - 23/11/2022 06:00 - Germany

Today, I had terrible nightmares and woke up several times because of them, as well as my roommates having a pen and paper session downstairs. I had to get up at 6:30 a.m. and sit through a whole day of team training at work, barely staying awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 644

You deserved it 129

Safe bet

By Pee.H.D - 02/05/2016 17:24 - United States - Fontana

Today, since I always fall asleep in class, I decided not to go to the bathroom beforehand, hoping the need to pee would keep me awake. I ended up falling asleep and wetting myself in the middle of the lecture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 873

You deserved it 7 275

Social animal

By Well then - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I realised that the only thing that's got fucked since I started university is my sleep cycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 306

You deserved it 525

Surveillance

By Shelly Skaggs - 26/11/2023 07:30

Today, I took a online midterm for a 400 level class I need to graduate this winter. I didn't realize that Proctorio links your computer to your phone, so when I opened my phone and googled the exact question, it gave me a notification on my screen which Proctorio screen recorded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69

You deserved it 1 347

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, someone said not to speak to them like I'm "better than them." I asked how they would like me to speak; I couldn't figure out the problem. The response I got was, "Speak to me like you speak to your lord." Am I the idiot? I wasn't even the one who initiated the conversation to begin with, nor did I intend for beef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 70

Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 573

You deserved it 3 705

Today, a police officer showed up to my house and informed me that my boyfriend was killed in an accident. Later, I found out it was a prank set up by a friend. He thought faking his death would be easier than confessing that he was leaving me for someone else. He didn’t want to see me get "upset". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 424

You deserved it 84

Today, I have a stutter that gets worse with stress. We got a new supervisor today and the first thing she said to me was, “Either spit it out or write it in an email, for fuck's sake!” I’m now so scared of her, I go almost mute if we’re in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 602

You deserved it 115

Today, I had a relaxing night watching movies with my room-mates. Everyone but I had a girl over to lie with during the movie. The closest I got all night was the multiple times my room-mate's dog tried to mount me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 686

You deserved it 3 959

Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 150

You deserved it 3 618