When you brag a bit too much By Lewis - 11/12/2018 00:30 do not count your chickens before they hatch I agree, your life sucks 231 You deserved it 155 Share Tweet Share
Today, I fell asleep listening to my music and tanning at the beach. Not only did I wake up with a sunburn, but my iPhone had been stolen. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 324 You deserved it 28 829
Today, as a 6 ft 8 woman, I never get much attention from men, until today when a guy who was 7 ft 1 approached me at the bar with the chat up line, "Hey little lady, you look about my size, can I buy you a drink?" It worked. I'm such a stereotype, we’re going on a date tomorrow. FML I agree, your life sucks 955 You deserved it 540
Today, my dad is mad at me because I refused to buy a truck. An ugly old Isuzu with two flat tires and a missing headlight, and the owner said it needed a new transmission & brakes, but still wanted $8000. Apparently, without consulting me, Dad promised him I'd buy it as payment for guns he bought. Now he's in debt. FML I agree, your life sucks 580 You deserved it 84
Today, I caught my husband and the cat licking the butter together. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 287 You deserved it 2 306
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate. I wanted to make it last longer, so I tried thinking of something else. Suddenly she says, "What are you thinking?" I reply, "Dead puppies." This apparently turned her off more than it did me, because she got out of the bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 222 You deserved it 31 230
Today, I was late for work and took a taxi. The driver told me he tried to commit suicide recently. I listened to him for 20 minutes, sat outside my workplace with the meter off. He charged me £5.80 and my boss gave me a warning for being late. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 307 You deserved it 3 440
Run Forest...Run!