Wake Up Call - FML

Wake Up Call

By FML Approved - 07/10/2017 03:00

The most frustrating sound ever.

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 90

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Top comments

Donut_Wizard 23

Saturday 7 October 2017 4:05

This is usually followed by the "plotting their demise knowing that you will never actually act on it" phase.

Comments

Donut_Wizard 23

Saturday 7 October 2017 4:05

This is usually followed by the "plotting their demise knowing that you will never actually act on it" phase.

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Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 877

You deserved it 6 553

Today, I found out why the only business in town that operates in my chosen industry won’t hire me. Several months ago, my father antagonised the owner, bringing up my name in the process. I haven’t spoken to the man in five years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 105

You deserved it 73

Today, I was at the airport trying to help a man get to the right terminal. When he finished he turned to tell me "Don't worry, your English is pretty good, considering you're not American". English is my only language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 252

You deserved it 5 217

Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 611

You deserved it 2 740

Today, my 4-year-old son is distraught. This morning we saw a man, dressed as Santa, passed out drunk on a public bench. My son is now convinced that it was his corpse, and that Santa Claus is dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 83

Today, my neighbor respects that I keep a clean house, with no street shoes allowed inside. I bet that’s why he came in wearing felt slippers. Unfortunately, they were same ones he'd walked across the wet, dirty yard in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 127