FML's guide to a stress-free St Patrick's Day By Louis - 17/03/2017 18:15 - France - Paris Savour the flavor of the day, but be careful out there! I agree, your life sucks 724 You deserved it 196 Share Tweet Share
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 226 You deserved it 218
Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute without saying "YOLO" or "Swag". He's going to be here for a week. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 358 You deserved it 3 932
Today, my wife is convinced I don't love my daughter. Why? She got her first boyfriend recently, and I was friendly with the lad, instead of doing the stupid "overprotective dad" routine. Apparently, not feeling the need to act like a dumbass sitcom character means I secretly resent my family. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 552 You deserved it 128
Today, is another day that my wife will choose anything over sex. I don't want to flirt with her anymore. If I can't have a normal sex life, I would rather embrace celibacy. I love her and was flirting with her daily up until now, but if she needs some other kind of confirmation to feel sexy, she can go ahead and find it. I'm done. FML I agree, your life sucks 350 You deserved it 148
Today, I was blowing my husband when we heard that distinctive shutter noise, and we realised our daughter had taken a photo of us. Apparently, she meant to take a video because she knows a website where any kind of "spying on people having sex" video will earn her $50. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 808 You deserved it 966
Today, my 5 week old puppy decided to sleep between my head and the headboard of my bed. I sneezed and my puppy got so scared it caused him to pee on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 566 You deserved it 8 599