FML's guide to a stress-free St Patrick's Day By Louis - 17/03/2017 18:15 - France - Paris Savour the flavor of the day, but be careful out there! I agree, your life sucks 724 You deserved it 196 Share Tweet Share
Today, I went to bed, falling asleep quickly; however, my cat decided to show up and lay on top of me, making me so uncomfortably hot and sweaty that my body immediately woke me up so I wouldn't die of a heat stroke. It's fucking 1:00 AM. He NEVER sleeps with me. FML I agree, your life sucks 645 You deserved it 204
Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML I agree, your life sucks 17 147 You deserved it 58 686
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML I agree, your life sucks 17 433 You deserved it 40 031
Today, I went on a date and ate in the park. When I crossed my legs under the table, I scraped my knee and got a lot of splinters in it. When I got back home and started digging out the splinters, my dad furiously demanded to know why I'd been on my knees during the date. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 705 You deserved it 4 849
Today, I came home in an awful mood, and grumbled to my wife that sometimes I want to strangle my boss. My wife regularly screams up and down the house over the most minor shit, but apparently this upset her so much that she took the kids to her mom's, and is demanding I get anger management. FML I agree, your life sucks 523 You deserved it 95
Today, I found out my mom is banging my ex-boyfriend's best friend. He’s 22 and my mom is 50. Oh, and not only does my ex know, but so does the whole town. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 558 You deserved it 346