Dramatic Entrance Fail By FML Approved - 01/08/2017 03:28 It's not easy being cheesy... I agree, your life sucks 575 You deserved it 210 Share Tweet Share
Today, my wife sent me a text expressing her "love and thinking to the future with you, Chad". Too bad my name isn't Chad. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 896 You deserved it 268
Today, the woman who wanted a relationship, sent me heart kisses multiple times a day every day, and claimed that everything was perfect, bailed on me after I asked her if she could fit in one more than the current four days a month we see each other. FML I agree, your life sucks 746 You deserved it 117
Today, I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go to the movies. She replies, "Sorry I have to do stuff with my parents" Her mum calls and by mistake my girlfriend pressed loud speaker, the first thing her mum said was "Be back at 11". FML I agree, your life sucks 34 133 You deserved it 2 574
Today, I was at a friend's house teasing her with a pickle. She hates them so I thought it would be funny to pretend to deep throat it. Her dad came in and startled me so bad, I inhaled it. She had to call 911 while he performed the Heimlich maneuver. I’m no longer welcome back. FML I agree, your life sucks 245 You deserved it 1 352
Today, I caught my wife flicking a booger off her finger. I asked her why she was doing that and she said, "Because if I can't see where it lands, it disappears and is not gross". It landed on my arm. I saw where it landed, it did not disappear, and yes it is gross. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 023 You deserved it 184
Today, I took a look at my 9-year-old daughter's diary, thinking it would be full of cute stuff. Instead, it was full of hateful rants against me and my husband, as well the boys at her school, who she called gay because none of them ever hit on her. It seems I've failed as a parent. FML I agree, your life sucks 50 618 You deserved it 20 785
Thank god the garage door was in the way, mom might have been just another statistic from being run over.