TV shows

Love is blind

By Blinded - 23/09/2022 02:30 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I finally figured out who my girlfriend reminds me of when she wears her glasses: the character Newman from Seinfeld. I can't unsee it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 191

Tool Academy

By soundbox - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching "Tool Academy" with my girlfriend. When asked which Tool I would be, I replied with Power Tool. She then stated I would be "Tiny Tool." I'm 240 pounds. I don't know if she was calling me fat, or saying I have a small penis. My best guess would be both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 854

You deserved it 4 866

Escapism

By ChemoInReno - 26/06/2024 04:00 - Australia - Point Piper

Today, I am still recovering after my second round of chemotherapy. You’d think I’d be able to rest instead of making lunch and dinner for our kids, and cleaning the house. But no, my wife says that would mess up her day. Which is centred around an 8-hour M*A*S*H marathon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 111

Move!

By Anonymous - 06/02/2023 20:00

Today, I went to a TV show filming, but I was sitting behind what must've been the tallest person in the world. I'll probably only get to see the show properly once it airs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 121

Freak

By micahmatt - 26/08/2009 07:09 - United States

Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 477

You deserved it 5 055

Introverts can relate

By Trev - 22/08/2024 09:00 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I was at a party when I saw a guy I vaguely recognized. I walked up to him and said, "Hey! Long time no see!" He looked confused and said, "Sorry, do I know you?" After an awkward pause, I realized I didn't know him at all - I had mistaken him for a character from a TV show I'm currently binge-watching. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 529

SEXY!

By Anonymous - 20/03/2014 02:43 - United States - Canyon

Today, my boyfriend decided it was time to spice up our sex life. He now watches Sons Of Anarchy when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 266

You deserved it 6 996

Fair bargain, actually

By Glee fanatic - 04/04/2023 18:00

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I'd put him on a six-month sex ban if he didn't binge watch Glee with me. He took the sex ban without hesitation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 2 077

Floored

By smashyonewfloors - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Canada - High River

Today, my crew and I were berated by a client for not installing her new hardwood floor on time. We were only halfway through the day, but apparently it should have only taken "like, an hour?" because "The guys on the TV shows do it that fast." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 317

You deserved it 2 916

Close quarters

By Frannny - 15/08/2023 20:00

Today, my mother-in-law pulled into our driveway like a bat out of hell, knocking down the mailbox, and nearly running over our dog who was outside. What was the rush? Hannity was gonna come on TV. My husband refuses to find this woman a home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 116

Dear John

By Homegrown 2024 - 30/07/2024 13:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my girlfriend asked me to act more like Homelander in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 143

Missed opportunities

By Gail - 05/04/2021 00:30

Today, I told my wife I walked away from a £5000 bet I had a good chance at winning, because I refused to embarrass myself in public. She responded with a Star Trek reference, "Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack, rule of acquisition 109." My god, I married a heartless nerd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 1 248

Boo!

By Anonymous - 15/04/2022 08:00

Today, I excitedly waited to watch the finale and reunion of The Ultimatum on Netflix. It was the worst thing to ever happen to reality TV, which is really saying something considering all the shit out there. It was the only thing I was looking forward to in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 724

The eternal argument

By Annoyed atheist - 07/05/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, I was watching the episode of New Amsterdam where a man's cancer goes into remission very abruptly. As the doctors wonder how the hell that's possible, my mom says, "God." Okay. So if this "God" controls what happens to your body, why is cancer still a thing? My mom is no longer religious. She's delusional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 305

Spoiler alert

By thanks a lot! - 17/07/2022 19:00 - United States

Today, I introduced my friend to a show I really like. I told her that I’m only halfway through the second season, but she should check it out. Since she’s on leave from work, she decided to binge watch every available episode, then text me multiple spoilers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 057

You deserved it 227

Soap opera drama

By Anonymous - 26/05/2022 06:00

Today, my wife has gotten into the habit of commenting on how much more attractive men in Latin soap operas are than me. When I suggested that an older character on the show looked like her mom, she started crying, and yelling about how hard the actress's life has been. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 107

Parasocial

By NotJessePinkmanFFS - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Norwalk

Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went up to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 122

You deserved it 2 380

What's Charlie Sheen up to these days?

By Anonymous - 16/06/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my brother, a real Alan Harper-type of snivelling parasite, has been sleeping on my sofa for over a week since his girlfriend threw him out. If I kick him out, the guilt will eat me alive, but now my wife has informed me I’m never getting sex again until he’s gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285

You deserved it 217

Parasocial

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Ireland

Today, I went shopping with my sister. Looking for something to say, I told her how one of my friends had been burglarized. Then I realised it was Bree on Desperate Housewives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 248

You deserved it 61 695

These '80s nostalgia trends are getting out of hand

By Anonymous - 15/08/2023 04:00

Today, I was waiting for my boyfriend with wet celery, a flying helmet, a feather duster, and an egg whisk as an 'Allo 'Allo! themed sex joke. He didn’t get it so I had to explain it to him, which kind of ruined the joke. In the end we just spent yet another sexless night, bored, watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 346

The YouTube police

By Anonymous - 11/10/2023 07:30

Today, just like almost every other day, my mom goes onto the computer and scolds me for what I watch on YouTube, even when the videos aren't that graphic. Today she scolded me because she found out that I'd watched videos related to the Max Headroom signal intrusion back in '87. Why can't I just watch what I want? FML

I agree, your life sucks 535

You deserved it 158

Bonding moment

By Anonymous - 31/12/2013 20:11 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I introduced my dad, who is a surgeon, to the TV show 'House, M.D.' I thought it'd be a good bonding experience. How wrong I was. He spent the whole time yelling about the "insane" medical inaccuracies, then lectured me about my crappy taste in TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 116

You deserved it 10 170

Where am I?

By Anonymous - 13/03/2023 20:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I was so tired from staying up late binge-watching my favorite show that I accidentally put my phone in the refrigerator instead of the milk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 211

You deserved it 956

Brainrot strikes again

By Anonymous - 11/12/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 240

Osmosis

By brazo667 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Fort Stewart

Today, I have spent so much time watching Scooby Doo with my son that I actually used the word "Zoinks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 015

You deserved it 5 994

Omar?

By Xander - 24/11/2022 17:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my girlfriend watched my favorite show for the first time and was really crazy about this one character. She said she wanted a man like him. The man of my girlfriend's dreams is a fictional gay guy who robs drug dealers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 138

BBUK 2024

By Pete - 17/11/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I had managed to avoid any mention of who won Big Brother because I couldn't watch it live, and I had planned to watch it on replay tonight. All was going to plan until my arsehole brother sent me a text that simply said, "Spoiler alert: Ali won." FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 210

Too much TV rots your brain (so they say)

By Itstheapocalypse - 26/11/2017 19:00

Today, while performing a therapeutic massage, I dropped my clients head, shuddered, and jumped away. Why? I watch too much Walking Dead and when I lifted her head to stretch her neck, her soft breathing sounded like a zombie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 378

You deserved it 3 150

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 17/06/2024 12:00 - Australia

Today, I came home to find my dog had not only shredded my favorite couch cushion but had also attempted to eat the TV remote. I have no idea how to change the channel manually. It looks like I'll be watching Animal Planet forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 239

Inspiring

By indierocklove - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 758

You deserved it 8 961

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my friend made me go on a carnival ride. The whole time, I complained that I was going to puke. I didn't, though. She did, all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 494

You deserved it 6 162

Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years, called me and demanded to know where his Father's Day gift was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 596

You deserved it 3 380

Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 933

You deserved it 28 397

Today, I discovered the "may have a laxative effect" warning on my sugar-free jelly beans should actually read "don't fart after consuming". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 909

You deserved it 5 689

Today, my girlfriends and I got a caricature painting while on a trip in the city. Unfortunately for me, the part of my appearance that the artist decided to exaggerate was my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 230

You deserved it 3 904

Today, one of my best friends got over 6k followers on Instagram in less than 2 months. I've had my account almost two years and can't get over 500. I'm the one that taught her all the "cheats" to get into the algorithm. They worked for her but not for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 916