Anger issues

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 02:01

Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 861

You deserved it 374

Slight anger issues

By IsabellaM - 27/05/2022 14:01

Today, my husband broke the vase and smashed the chandelier in the hallway, all because I asked him who he was on the phone with. His exact words were, “Do you ever just mind your fucking business? Goddamn!” Oh, and he told me I have to buy a new vase and replace the chandelier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 211

The chase

By Paula - 05/11/2024 12:00 - Canada

Today, I went for a "relaxing" walk on a local trail. I got chased by an angry goose halfway back to my car. Apparently, it didn’t appreciate my "peaceful" attempt to take a selfie with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 954

Respect

By Anonymous - 25/04/2026 03:00 - Curaçao

Today, I came home from school and went upstairs to sit on the balcony. I walked past my mom and said hello. She then got mad at me because I didn't ask how her day was. She said I should stay in my room and that I don't deserve dinner because I don't value her tasks in the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 58

It's sus to us

By Clean up time - 15/11/2023 08:00

Today, I sat my husband down for a talk for him to stop going to his female coworker’s house until 1-2am. He insists they’re doing work projects. He became so offended that I thought otherwise that he thrashed the entire living room, stomped out of the house, and slammed the door, completely dislodging it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 158

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 28/02/2022 21:59 - United States - Morganville

Today, I thought the cashier said the new blouse I picked out was ugly as she was ringing me up. I'm really self-conscious about my fashion sense, so I snapped and started yelling at her. It wasn't until she was close to tears did I find out she said "lovely" not "ugly". So, that's another store I can't go back to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 191

You deserved it 3 023

I just love to rant

By Anonymous - 15/02/2022 12:00 - United States - Verona

Today, my mother went on another rant about the Smart TV not working. Instead of turning it off and on like she's been told to do before, she'll sit and complain about it. Even fixing it for her doesn't stop her complaining for another half-hour about technology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 09/07/2014 20:49 - United States

Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 855

You deserved it 17 254

Hangry

By Anonymous - 23/05/2021 06:01

Today, my son threw a temper tantrum and told me I “should have aborted him” and threatened to run away from home. Why? Because I nicely asked him to share his french fries with his sister. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 265

Impatience

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 02:00

Today, my dad asked me to help him buy a laptop by searching online. He explicitly said, "When you have time." I decided to shower as I had just woken up. While showering, I was startled by loud banging and my dad angrily asking why I wasn't looking for his laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 772

You deserved it 152

This ain't it chief

By JemapelleStupid - 27/04/2022 06:00

Today, I was logging into my work computer. My account became locked due to the many failed attempts at typing my password. Thinking I was alone, I said, “Fuck this shit” while dragging the keyboard off my desk. Turns out my supervisor was in the other room. I'd forgotten I'd changed my password the other day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 1 050

Tetchy

By Brokendishes - 21/08/2022 18:00

Today, my husband broke a set of dishes, told me I had to clean it all up, and stormed out of the house. It’s now 3:30am and he still hasn’t come home. Our 5 year-old son keeps asking about him. What warranted all this? Asking him how his day went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 146

Nightmare

By Anonymous - 01/03/2025 15:00 - Germany

Today, I have the perfect life. The best husband, two well behaved kids, a well paying job, and a happy home. But I just pick random fights with my husband, instigating him into shouting for no reason. I guess I want problems to be happy. My whole soul wants peace, except my stupid brain and hormones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 831

That would be correct

By Anonymous - 23/07/2023 00:02

Today, my dad is infuriating by increasingly asking me to do things around the house, but because he doesn’t like how I do them he yells at me and then does it himself. It’s almost like he cares more about inventing excuses to yell at me than he does to actually get things done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 166

Peak toxic masculinity

By Anonymous - 13/03/2022 06:00

Today, ever since he beat him in wrestling, my husband has been trying to prove he’s manlier than our son, proving only that he’s the most childish in the house. I had to put a stop to it after he tried to stand up to the PTSD-suffering veteran at the end of our street, and got put in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 058

You deserved it 144

Bad day, huh?

By Anonymous - 28/10/2023 05:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I had a Tesla nearly run me off the road. Then after I parked, I crossed the street at a crosswalk. A car stopped for me, rolled his window down, then yelled at me for wearing a black raincoat. Mean people make me want to be mean to everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 175

Anger management

By Wife of a moron - 03/09/2025 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I watched my husband attempt to make Cup Noodles. He used the Keurig to make hot water, instead of the kettle or microwave, then he burned himself trying to pour it, got angry, and smashed the mug and the noodles. I married this man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 358

Drive-thru rage

By TheDrugsAreStrongWithThisOne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a customer wanted corporate's number because we aren't allowed to sell pies after midnight. After a drug-fuelled cuss-storm, she punched me in the face through the open window, then peeled out of drive-thru like a bat out of hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 284

You deserved it 2 018

Yada yada yada

By Anonymous - 16/10/2021 02:00

Today, I asked my husband how much he loved me and he refused to answer, because he was convinced I was using some unfair logic to start an argument, simply because I wanted to argue over something, anything. I later realised he was probably right. I’m an awful person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 1 773

Ticking time bomb

By Gear Desolite - 17/12/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, the most important aspect of my day is to keep my head on my shoulders and not explode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 106

Rage against the wrong machine

By shit happens??? - 20/05/2022 15:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend who’s rage quit multiple games, screamed cuss words for hitting too many red lights, and broke his new phone when a legendary Pokémon escaped after a raid in Pokémon Go, told me I was too dramatic. Sorry for being depressed that my biopsy results weren’t good. Shit happens, huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 172

You deserved it 161

Oh no, the humanity!

By clown head - 24/08/2023 21:00 - United States

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend had dyed her hair a ridiculous bright color. She knows I absolutely fucking despise brightly colored hair on women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 1 426

Meltdown

By hey Siri save me! - 15/07/2021 04:01

Today, like most days, my mom screamed at me for not knowing the answer to one of her random questions. When I told her she could easily Google it or ask Siri, she went full nuclear meltdown and raged, "I’m not asking that bitch Siri, I’m asking YOU!" The words "batshit crazy" come to mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 135

The need to vent

By Anonymous - 28/12/2021 14:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that the whole time I was rant-texting to my ex's blocked number, he may possibly have been getting all of them, unless he blocked me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 1 708

Mask confusion

By clairebear99 - 08/06/2021 08:01

Today, my coworker screamed at me for once again calling her by a different coworker's name. They have the same hair, skin color, and body type, so I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to tell them apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 1 557

Chill out

By Utterly fucked - 17/04/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom - Stourbridge

Today, I got into a stupid argument with an internet troll, who ended up making me so furious that I threw my laptop straight through my window. My dad will be home any minute. I'm a dead man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59

You deserved it 1 016

Anger management

By Emily - 07/12/2022 18:00

Today, I was mad at my boyfriend, so I yanked the power cord for his computer while he was gaming. Turns out, that fried part of his computer and now it won't turn on. He broke up with me, even after I apologized, and offered to replace the part. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 2 531

Road rage

By howannoying - 16/02/2013 06:24 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage." When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 330

You deserved it 3 910

Jekyll and Hyde

By Anonymous - 09/08/2021 10:01

Today, I found out my "nice" boss was only nice to me for my first month. She's now started yelling at me for every little thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 855

You deserved it 96

The struggle is real

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 02:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, my parents are upset that I never ask them for help with my homework and struggle with it myself. They won't accept the answer that whenever I do, they're always yelling at me and putting me down. Dad in particular can't get through one assignment without becoming a screaming tyrant about my handwriting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 523

You deserved it 103

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The Top

Today, I tried to play with my Wii using the TV remote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 163

You deserved it 31 588

Today, I had a nightmare and woke up terrified, scaring my roommate. What was the dream? That I'd had a panic attack because my box of Honey Nut Cheerios was torn and the bag inside was improperly folded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 108

You deserved it 4 377

Today, I found out that when I drink alcohol, I snore so bad my boyfriend contemplated suffocating me with a pillow to get some sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 116

You deserved it 809

Today, my stepfather refused to drive me to the hospital after having a toothpick that was left on the floor lodge itself and break off in the bottom of my foot. He's the only person in the house that uses toothpicks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 229

You deserved it 97

Today, I had to slowly explain to my best friend that when babies are born, the umbilical cord is attached to the baby's belly-button, not the mother's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 552

You deserved it 1 865

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 444

You deserved it 5 097