The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day

The top of the week

The top of the month The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

Heavy sleeper

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, in protest at my girlfriend stealing the blankets every night, I actually bought myself a separate duvet. She stole that one too in her sleep, wrapped it round herself, and turned over so many times it disappeared under her somewhere. I went and slept on the sofa in my dressing gown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 46

Time to chime in

By Women don't owe men shit - 23/04/2026 09:00 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, I heard my husband giving my son the talk about girls. He said, "You want three main things from women: peace, sex, and kids. If they can't give you those, they aren't worth your time." What an asshole I married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 249

Close call

By NotKarenTrustMe - 19/04/2026 09:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I called the Vietnamese teacher at my son's kindergarten by my Chinese colleague's name. Luckily, she didn't catch it. I'm not a racist, I was just tired after a long day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 98

Faux pas

By Awkward - 20/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, visiting my partner’s family for the first time, I offered to help cook, saying I could chop the vegetables. Five minutes later, I nicked my finger, dropped the knife, and instinctively said a very loud curse word in front of their very traditional grandparents. Everyone froze while someone went to get me a bandage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252

You deserved it 155

Encouraging

By Driver8 - 21/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I was making small talk with a passenger in my taxi. He was heading to a job interview, so I tried to encourage him by saying, “Don’t worry, even if you mess up, there are plenty of other companies.” He paused then said, “I’m actually interviewing to save the company I already work for.” We spent the rest of the drive in silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 97

I'm doing fine

By Superdad - 20/04/2026 03:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, trying to prove I can handle things solo while my wife is away. I packed my kid’s lunch, dropped him at school, and felt very accomplished… until the teacher emailed me a picture of the lunchbox. I had packed my own leftover spicy curry instead of his sandwich. Apparently, “It was too spicy but also kind of good.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 202

Saucy surprise

By Liquor needed urgently - 22/04/2026 03:00 - The Netherlands

Today, I walked in on my daughter-in-law pegging my son, who was tied to the bed. You know, I try to be open-minded and figure they can do whatever between themselves, but maybe not in my spare room? FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 96

Go trend elsewhere

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I tried a trend I saw where you’re supposed to hug your sibling to see what they do. I didn’t film it, I was just genuinely curious. He flinched and hit me in the face with a book. One of my fillings fell out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 97

Running man

By Fresh and not fit - 24/04/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I'm training for my first half marathon so I went for a run in a busy park. I tripped on a completely flat path in front of about twenty people. Not only did I fall, but my wireless earbuds flew out dramatically in opposite directions. Some wise ass golf clapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 74

You learn something new every day

By Anonymous - 20/04/2026 13:00 - United States - Concord

Today, after 40+ years of marriage, I got Peyronie's disease. Thankfully, the missus is understanding. After months of treatment, the painful bend is a bit less so, but the scar tissue that causes the bend also does not expand. Because of this, I have lost a full 5 cm / 2 inches in length when erect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 62

I hate surprises

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my husband and kids apparently forgot my birthday. I was so happy at first because I have always hated my birthday, and thought it could just be another day on the calendar. No. They planned and threw a massive surprise party for me when I got home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 351

Close shave

By Anonymous - 21/04/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, as a barista, I tried to be quick during the morning rush. Someone asked for oat milk, so I grabbed the carton without checking. It wasn’t oat milk, it was the cleaning solution bottle we keep under the counter, same shape, same colour cap. Luckily I noticed before serving it, but my manager watched the entire thing in silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 357

Who's the asshat in this scenario?

By Anonymous - 22/04/2026 13:00 - United States

Today, my mom told me that I will never see my siblings again because I refused to attend her wedding to another woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 719

Intentional?

By Libris Mortis - 22/04/2026 21:00 - United States - New York

Today, I intentionally caused my parents to have an intensely heated argument when I asked them how and where they first met. Dad said it was at a funeral, and mom said it was at a burial. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 229

Doordash off

By I hate my life - 24/04/2026 15:00 - United States - Clarksville

Today, driving for a food delivery app, I had a perfectly stacked order: drinks secure, food hot, great timing. I hit the brakes too hard at a light and watched in horror as one soda tipped, leaked and soaked the bottom of the bag. I delivered a soggy lukewarm meal, and an apologetic explanation. The customer said “It’s OK” in a tone that meant it’s absolutely not OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 105

FIXED

By Anonymous - 20/04/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, I pulled an all-nighter to finish an essay. I submitted it one minute before the deadline. Later, I opened the file to double-check and realized I'd uploaded my rough draft, containing notes like “THIS PART MAKES NO SENSE, FIX LATER.” The professor then replied, “I agree with your assessments.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 385

Leave it to the specialists

By Anonymous - 21/04/2026 00:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I tried to fix a leaky pipe after watching a tutorial. I turned what I thought was the main valve to cut the water, loosened the pipe, and immediately got sprayed in the face. In my panic, I tightened it wrong and made it worse. I had to call a plumber while standing in a puddle, holding a towel against the pipe like that was helping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 299

Worst friend

By Cass - 20/04/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my best friend announced that he has a girlfriend now and we’ll be interacting less often. When I protested, he said, “Why are you acting like this? You rejected me when I asked you to be my girlfriend and told me we were just friends, did you not?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 811

Hard times

By Anonymous - 24/04/2026 17:00 - United States

Today, I learned that my brother isn't going to have a funeral because my dad and stepmom can't afford one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 16

Passionate

By Anonymous - 19/04/2026 20:00 - Australia

Today, I spent 10 minutes passionately explaining a concept on the board while the class was unusually quiet. When I turned around, half the students were trying not to laugh. I had written the entire explanation with a marker that was completely dried out. The board was blank. I essentially gave a TED Talk to a wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108

You deserved it 364

i'm late

By Fluster time - 22/04/2026 09:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I work remotely and had an online meeting with clients in different time zones. I double-checked the time… or so I thought. I joined 30 minutes late, rushed in apologizing, only to realise I had actually logged into the wrong meeting entirely and interrupted another team’s presentation. My actual meeting had already ended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 410

Anger management

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my parents tried to apologize for wrongly grounding me. I told them to go fuck themselves, so now I'm re-grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 725

Season 3 claims another victim

By Bless - 24/04/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, I was watching Euphoria’s new season and my mom barged in without knocking to ask me something. At that precise moment, a very explicit sex scene came on. She threw a bitch fit, tore up my prom ticket and told me that I ever lose my virginity while living under her roof, she’ll kick me out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 38

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 24/04/2026 13:00 - United States - Fontana

Today, I feel like I’m living in some horrible campy horror comedy. I was walking to the kitchen when my cat ran under my feet, causing me to trip and fall backward through my glass table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 25

Caution flag

By Punishment is coming - 23/04/2026 00:00 - The Netherlands

Today, my husband and son ganged up on me in a game of Mario Kart. I threw the game down and stormed off. The last thing I saw was them high-fiving and yelling "RAGE QUIT" and laughing hysterically. They will both suffer for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 485

Hand it over

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 08:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 610

Nature ain't all that great

By Beaten by deer - 18/04/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, an adorable deer got into the yard, so I went to pet it. It jumped on its back legs and started flailing its front legs around, kicking the crap out of me until I curled into a ball crying. I'm so bruised, I can barely sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 1 034

Interesting design choice

By Graphic design - 24/04/2026 03:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I sent a final logo to a client after weeks of revisions. They loved it and immediately posted it on their website. An hour later I realized I'd left a placeholder font in one section that replaced a key letter with a random symbol. Their brand name now included what looked like a tiny alien face. It stayed live for six hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 203

That was fun

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I was babysitting and told the kid we’d make pancakes from scratch. I mixed everything, poured the batter, and waited. They never set. I'd forgot to add flour. The kid looked at the pan, then at me, and said, “Is this soup?” I ordered pizza and tried to spin it as a “fun cooking experiment.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 242

Quick

By Bad interning - 24/04/2026 20:00 - Australia

Today, I was asked to “schedule a quick call” with a client in a different time zone. I double-checked everything… except daylight savings. I sent the invite, joined the call early, and waited alone for 20 minutes before realising I'd scheduled it an hour off. My manager had to email the client an apology while I learned more about time zones than I ever wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 97

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Technology Work Management Health Medication Allergies Family Miscellaneous Abuse Money Funerals Sex Ironic Intimacy NSFW Cats Anger issues Television TV shows Customers Embarrassing School Education Cooking Awkward Babysitter Kids Argument Parents Video games

The Top

Today, it's been three months since my sister broke her car, meaning she couldn't get to work, and I've giving her money every month so she could buy food and so on. I just found out that her workplace is less than 200 metres from where she lives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 297

You deserved it 5 174

Today, I dropped and snapped a carving knife that’s been in my girlfriend's family for generations, and is used to carve the meat every Christmas. I'm a huge coward, so I hid it back in its box but when it gets taken out again Christmas Day 2022, I think I’m a dead man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 1 484

Today, three teenage punks harassed me spewing made up Chinese. They might've scored a bingo, because a group of royally pissed off Chinese men came and attacked them. The cops arrived and took them, and me, not believing that I wasn't with them. Their evidence: one of punk's phones shows one of them consoling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 72

Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 210

You deserved it 13 418

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my dorm roommate having sex three feet from me. He was sober, knew I was there, and has a deployed military girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 534

You deserved it 241

Today, when my son told me he wanted to work with animals, I thought he meant a vet, turns out his actual career goal was to be the guy who puts the strays to sleep at the animal control centre. He got that job and I’ve never seen him happier. What monster have I raised? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 190