The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month

The top of the year

Bad start

By Tum - 27/02/2026 12:00

Today, I was starting a new job that requires me to wake up at 4 am. I set three alarms but was so nervous about sleeping through them that I kept waking up to check the time, which caused me to miss my alarms. Goodbye awesome new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 142

Planned parenthood

By NPRM - 03/03/2026 00:00

Today, my husband and I got into yet another fight because he wants a second kid and I don't. One kid is enough for any family but he won't listen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 309

Double life

By Anonymous - 04/03/2026 20:00

Today, I found out that the guy I’d been seeing for four months, with holidays, gifts, intimacy, meeting friends, the whole “building something” vibe, had secretly been on a dating app sleeping with another girl the whole time (she also still doesn't know). He lied, offered no apology, and justified his actions by saying, “We weren’t official.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 121

Looksmaxxing

By Anonymous - 06/03/2026 15:00

Today, I accidentally gave myself a black eye. I would laugh about it if my friends didn't start suspecting that my husband is abusing me, and won't listen when I try to explain what really happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 78

Yoyo

By Anonymous - 19/03/2026 00:00

Today, after injuring my muscles in my hip trying to do my stretches from my physical therapy, my weight has rebounded in an awful way. Even trying proper portion control doesn't cause my weight to budge and I can't treat myself without my weight leaping 5 pounds or more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 298

You deserved it 134

Be curious, you never know…

By Not interested dude take the hint - 24/03/2026 09:00

Today, I was wondering if I might be bi, so I hopped on Grindr and met up with a cute guy to experiment with. It ended up being so awful that I decided nope, definitely not bi. Unfortunately now he won't leave me alone, even after I told him that I made a mistake and I'm not interested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 268

Atomic family

By Anonymous - 27/03/2026 22:00

Today, I found out that my dad and mom, who just passed away, were never married and that my siblings and I weren't actually his. Now there's the very real possibility that we could be taken away. I'll die if that happens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 64

Everyone can be a 7

By Langer - 31/03/2026 12:00

Today, I realized how fucked up the dating world is when I noticed girls wanting to be all over me once I lost 65 pounds. This girl who put me in the friendzone three years ago is now wanting to latch onto me. It makes me want to not try because apparently, love is conditional. I quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 438

Cash out crashout

By Anonymous - 05/04/2026 21:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I applied for a 0% balance transfer credit card to switch my balance. The application crashed at the last stage and now I've been told I might not get the same limit, plus my credit score is affected if I apply again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 80

Never a dull moment

By Annoyed - 09/04/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, I’m a nurse on a night shift and I finally got a quiet moment to eat. I heated my meal, sat down, and took one bite before my pager went off. By the time I got back 40 minutes later, someone had “cleaned up” the break room and thrown my untouched dinner away. I ate crackers from a vending machine at 3 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 86

You have been warned

By stay away from my balls! - 16/04/2026 14:00 - United States

Today, I went to the farm my girlfriend's parents live on. She was showing me around the barn when she picked up a tool and said, "We used this to castrate the goats… and I'll use it on you if you piss me off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 129

Old boys' club

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I anonymously reported a coworker for a very serious breach of the rules. He was in the HR office for about 30 seconds, then came out laughing with the HR director, talking about a football match they both watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 106

We're here for you 24/7

By Anonymous - 20/04/2026 01:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I am once again dealing with severe depression and anxiety. I go through this cycle every three months. I’ve tried almost every antidepressant available and nothing helps. I’m sick of it and sick of life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 112

That was fun

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I was babysitting and told the kid we’d make pancakes from scratch. I mixed everything, poured the batter, and waited. They never set. I'd forgot to add flour. The kid looked at the pan, then at me, and said, “Is this soup?” I ordered pizza and tried to spin it as a “fun cooking experiment.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 294

The worst excuse

By Anonymous - 29/04/2025 00:00 - South Africa

Today, after my boyfriend broke things off saying he couldn't handle being in a relationship after the death of his brother, I found out that he's back on Tinder not even three weeks after the break up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 117

Open wide

By Anonymous - 02/05/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I had a dentist appointment and was running late. I frantically put on my shoes and rushed out of the house. When I arrived at the dentist’s office, they told me I was scheduled for a root canal, not a cleaning. I forgot to confirm the appointment. After I sat down in the chair, I tried to back out, but they were already numbing my gums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 525

Ticket to ride

By Newny_Newny_Newny - 04/05/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, after I just finished a 16-hour double shift, my brother asked me to ride with him to do an Instacart. While delivering these people’s groceries, his car overheated and oil light came on. He had no money, so I had to fix and pay for the parts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 84

No laugh track required

By Anonymous - 06/05/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I sneezed so hard at work that I farted. In the silence in our open space office that followed, my boss looked over, smiled, and said, "Bless you?" The people in the office who weren't wearing headphones burst out laughing, then those people noticed the laughter, took their headphones off, and my boss then had to explain to them why they were laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 132

Nervous

By Z…… - 08/05/2025 04:00 - China

Today, I went to the hospital for constant dizziness and insomnia, and was diagnosed with anxiety. I figured out that the main source of my anxiety is not my job but my boyfriend, who has avoidant personality, which makes him constantly refuse almost everything that I request. He's a guy who just doesn't know how to show his love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 225

Praise the Lord

By Anonymous - 11/05/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, at 7am on a Saturday, my next door neighbor set up a preacher guy with a mic and large speaker. It's 2pm, and I can still hear him screaming about Jesus through my foam insulated walls and $300 noise canceling headphones. I can't sleep, and I'm injured so I can't leave home. That's my Shabbat ruined! FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 128

Falling

By Kassy - 16/05/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I treated myself to an hour long massage. Halfway through, I mumbled, “Thank you” to the masseuse and, without thinking, added, “I love you.” There was a long pause. Then she patted my head and whispered, “You’re welcome.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 157

You deserved it 343

Looking good

By Gracie - 20/05/2025 12:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, at the gym, I caught sight of myself in the mirror while lifting weights and thought, “Damn, I look good!” I smiled. Then I realized the mirror was actually a window. A group of people outside had been watching me flex with a shit-eating grin on my face for God know how long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 572

Samson v. Delilah

By Sagar - 24/05/2025 03:30 - India - Bengaluru

Today, and after I started losing my hair during my high school, my confidence is gone. I've struggled approaching women and have missed many opportunities. I'm 36 years-old now. Today, I connected with someone online, and when I told her about my situation, her response was, "Sorry, I'm not feeling that spark." FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 145

Stop moving!

By Anonymous - 29/05/2025 20:00 - Australia

Today, I had to try and capture some of my dog’s pee to get tests done. During the attempt, he pissed all up my arm, the ordeal drawing a crowd of spectators who no doubt think I’ve gone mad. After all that, the sample captured wasn’t enough to be tested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 106

Grow up

By Anonymous - 01/06/2025 15:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today my boyfriend (maybe ex) is pissed at me because when he asked for space, I gave him exactly that. I didn’t call, text, or give any sort of communication. He took it as a sign that I must not be truly invested in us if I didn’t reach out. I thought we were adults not highschoolers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 106

Petty BS

By Anonymous - 05/06/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a coworker told me that another coworker only treats me badly because I never asked her out. We’ve worked together for 3 years, if she wanted a date why didn’t she just ask me out instead? All she did was ruin her chances; she’s been so mean to me, I’d never ask her out now. What petty BS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 89

Treats

By Anonymous - 10/06/2025 11:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I found that if I want my husband to take me out, all I have to do is say that I’m trying to lose weight. Anytime I bring up dieting or weight loss, suddenly he wants to take me to every restaurant in town and splurge on sweets. Part of me wants to lose weight but I also enjoy the snacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 146

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 12/06/2025 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son swears blind he didn’t take my car joyriding last night. Thing is, I reverse into the drive. He drove it back in facing forwards, but no matter how I tell him, he doesn’t get it because the car's in the drive, so there’s no evidence, right? IT’S FACING THE WRONG WAY DUMBASS, I KNOW YOU TOOK IT. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 100

So, about that second date…

By Anonymous - 14/06/2025 09:00 - United States - Sacramento

Today, on a date, I told the guy I could swim. He suggested we race. I agreed to impress him. I jumped in, immediately panicked, inhaled water, and had to be helped out by a 10-year-old with floaties. He asked if I lied about anything else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 706

Bigmouth strikes again

By Ishouldnthavesaidthat - 15/06/2025 21:00 - United States - Queens

Today, I was leaving work to go home and ran into some people setting up an event in one of our rooms. In my socially anxious way, I told them they couldn’t use our equipment by saying my boss is a massive bitch. Turns out he knows my boss and disagrees. I hope he doesn’t say anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 601

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Love Confused Money Sex Health Anxiety Depression Mental health Clothes Work Kids Alcohol Parenting Ironic Poopoo peepee Weddings Miscellaneous Birthday Cars Embarrassing Transportation Awkward Vacation Family Bodyshaming Divorce NSFW Students School Technology

The Top

Today, as I'm laying in bed with my wife, she noticed I'm wasn't hard, so she said, "I can fix that." As I prepare myself for a BJ, she lifted my boxers and blew air on my member, and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 397

Today, I remembered that I have a mood tracker my therapist gave me that I haven't filled out. Because I wasn't in the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 187

You deserved it 424

Today, I realized that I'm at the age that whenever I mention a friend of the opposite gender, my family's first response is asking whether that friend is single. I've already accepted no one will want a pathetic freak like me, so their poking around what few friends I have makes it awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 187

Today, after finally applying myself and busting my butt all semester, I found out the school is accusing me of cheating because they couldn't believe I could have gotten near-perfect grades considering my grade history. If this is how society rewards academic turnarounds, why do I even bother? FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 043

You deserved it 1 203

Today, I went to my local pharmacy. Walking in, the security guard rudely asked me what I was going to buy. I brushed him off and walked in. I was paying and told the cashier what happened. She said, "Sorry, we get a lot of hobos, they tend to steal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 906

You deserved it 5 155

Today, I was at the airport about to leave for my business trip. In the restroom, I put my purse on the edge of the sink and got my lipstick out. I leaned closer to apply my lipstick and my open purse fell into the sink, triggering the automatic faucet, filling my purse with water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 782

You deserved it 10 033