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Cat fight

By Mishka - 03/05/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, we got a new kitten, and my older cat is not happy. I just learned that my fiance doesn't interfere when they fight. He says watching my old fat cat chase the kitten is the funniest thing he's seen all month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 441

Where am I?

By rmo1776 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to a very nice reception at a hotel. I glanced inside the ballroom and saw that no one else was in there and, not wanting to be the first one there, I walked past and into the stairway. Turns out, I had walked into the emergency exit stairs and had to set off the alarm to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 140

You deserved it 49 436

Time sensitive

By Landin - 12/05/2025 16:00 - United States - Vernal

Today, my girlfriend left me at 11pm after leading me on for 5 months, all because she lost interest. I wasted so much time, money, and emotions on her, and never received them from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 283

Busted

By Anonymous - 18/05/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boss caught me coming to work late. I panicked and told him I’d been there all day. He knows I do a lot of editing for Wikipedia, so he actually found my publicly listed edits showing I’d been publishing edits from my normal account, i.e. my home PC, when I should have been at work. Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64

You deserved it 938

Language, Timothy

By Anonymous - 30/05/2025 16:00 - United States - New York

Today, I saw my girlfriend after 10 months of being away. She was pregnant. She actually had the brass balls to tell me I needed to "Man up and be this child's father." Get the fuck out, you cheating whore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 72

Chill out zone

By Gassy Patient - 06/06/2025 14:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, while a patient in my local psych ward, I attended a relaxation group. Apparently it was too relaxing, as I farted in the middle of it. It smelled. People noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 150

Scammers

By insurance lies - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to get an MRI. I double and triple checked to make sure there was no out-of-pocket cost. When I arrived at the testing center, I was expected to pay full price for the test. It costs $2,360. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 031

You deserved it 4 002

Where did you learn that one?

By Kilamo - 19/06/2025 09:00 - France - Paris

Today, I tried to impress a French student by saying “Bonjour!” but instead said “Bordel!” which means “Brothel.” She laughed, and so did every one of the french students around us. My cultural street cred is officially dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 495

Bad start

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was running the track at my school. My crush of two years was running in front of me, so I decided to catch up and finally talk to her. When I caught up, the only thing I could think to say was, "What's your name?" even though I already knew. She replied, "Natalie". Her name is Melissa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 570

You deserved it 7 615

Snoopy

By No way - 16/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, I liked one of my crush’s Instagram post from 2012 while stalking his profile. Despite me realising my mistake and un-liking the post, he immediately followed me back, and sent me a DM saying, “Wow, that’s some deep digging.” I’m now referred to as his "creepy stalker archaeologist of Instagram." FML

I agree, your life sucks 113

You deserved it 559

The road to hell…

By Chris - 21/07/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to donate blood for the first time ever at the The 38th Annual Rock and Roll Up Your Sleeve Blood Drive. Unfortunately, someone with my exact name & birthdate was already in the system and 30 minutes were spent trying to correct the problem. Eventually, I got frustrated and left. No good deed goes unpunished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 128

Not even once

By Anonymous - 23/07/2025 08:00 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I got addicted to online slots, racked up nearly €30,000 in debt, and completely ruined my financial future. It’s been almost a year since I stopped gambling, but the shame and the debt are still crushing me. I’m trying to get back on my feet and even created a fundraiser just to breathe a bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 616

A blind date in 2025 is brave

By Anonymous - 26/07/2025 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a blind date at a coffee shop. I walked up to who I thought was him, smiled, and said, “Hey! You look even cuter in person!” He looked horrified. It wasn’t my date. My actual date witnessed the whole thing and ghosted me mid-latte. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 276

Chilling dystopian brainrot

By Anonymous - 28/07/2025 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, it's been a week since I giggled at my coworker who was worried our jobs will be replaced by AI, since we're delivery drivers. At first I was amused and sceptical, but some sort of paranoia has since kicked in, and I'm now imagining AI drones taking over our jobs and I'm bugging out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 378

Work is freedom, duh!

By Exhauster - 30/07/2025 09:00 - Netherlands

Today, I figured out how my wife sees things. When I'm at work, I don't have to deal with responsibilities at home. Thus, work is a mini-vacation, and since I take a mini-vacation every day, I should have no problem cooking dinner and cleaning for hours after work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 517

You deserved it 165

Drama farmer

By Anonymous - 01/08/2025 03:00 - United States - Boulder

Today, I stormed out of a restaurant after an argument with my boyfriend to make a dramatic exit. Instead of the front door, I marched into what turned out to be the kitchen. The entire restaurant heard me swear and then quietly shuffle back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 626

Thanks for nothing

By Anonymous - 02/08/2025 16:00 - United States

Today, I was surprised to see a little extra cash in my account for no reason. Confused, (and a little concerned about fraud) I called customer service. Turns out my dad had accidentally used the wrong routing number and put the money in the wrong account. So much for that extra $35. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 130

Glow down

By Anonymous - 06/08/2025 12:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I told my coworker she looked great and asked if she was “glowing” because she was pregnant. She isn’t pregnant. She is, however, going through a breakup and just gained 10 pounds from comfort eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 745

The world is a scary place, best be prepared

By Anonymous - 13/08/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, I have spent the last two hours at work looking for the gas pump model of a different gas station than the one I usually go to, only because I don’t want to be embarrassed if I don't know how to use it. All thanks to my crippling anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 215

Disconnect

By Sad vegan girl - 15/08/2025 03:00 - United States - New York

Today, I told my younger sister that meat comes from cute animals like chickens and cows, hoping she'd want to be vegan like me. Instead, she laughed and made up a song about how chickens turn into tenders and cows turn into cheeseburgers. I ended up being the one who got upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 1 306

Good boy nonetheless

By Ethan - 18/08/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I took my new puppy to the dog park, proud of my cute little fluff ball. Instead of behaving nicely like the other dogs present, my dog ignored every toy, treat and friendly dog, and ran straight into a pond. He emerged soaked, covered in mud, and proudly dropped a muddy stick at my feet like it was a trophy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 404

Gotta keep grinding

By Anonymous - 22/08/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, I was once again called into work on my day off after someone called in sick. All I want is one day where I get to stay home. Please. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 115

We care

By Ash - 25/08/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, my friend spent ages telling me about her friend who is in hospital underweight with anorexia and how she wants to do anything to help because she's so worried. What I wished I could've told her is that my own ED makes me suicidal and I'll probably not survive long, but I'm not underweight so nobody cares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 173

I can explain

By Anonymous - 29/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, on my lunch break, I was walking to my car balancing 3 tacos, soda and napkins. A gust of wind blew my napkins up the street. In my attempt to catch them, I tripped onto the sidewalk. The tacos landed inside a car. Its owner came out just in time to see me standing next to their dash covered in salsa and lettuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 162

EDs blow

By Shelby - 31/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, imagine you’re trying to be conscious about your spending habits, but you’re sad and so you decide to buy food, even though you have food at the house, then you eat it, enjoy it… then throw it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 189

You deserved it 350

Naira bucks

By Anonymous - 01/09/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I confidently walked into a meeting thinking I looked sharp in my new shirt. Halfway through, someone pointed out that the tag was still hanging out the back, flapping like a flag. It wasn’t even a size tag, it literally said "₦5,500" in bold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 320

Fight, flight, or freeze

By Broken - 03/09/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, a guy approached me at a party. He made small talk and said he wanted to get to know me. I've had enough of men's bullshit after what my exes put me through, and chimed back with, "Why? So you can then leave me for someone else when you get bored with me?" I do this to every potential suitor, and I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 808

Be warned

By Anonymous - 07/09/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I have to admit that while I do love my children I absolutely fucking hate being a mom. I hate that I’ve completely lost my identity to motherhood. I don’t even feel like a person anymore. Just an invisible servant and nothing more. I didn’t know it would be like this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 219

Deep cleanse

By Anonymous - 08/09/2025 22:00 - United States - Tacoma

Today, I took my car to the automatic wash for the first time in years. I didn’t realize you’re supposed to remember to close the sunroof. I now own a freshly-cleaned car interior, soaked seats, and one very wet, traumatized dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 612

Stalkers everywhere

By Anonymous - 10/09/2025 22:00

Today, I got another "secret admirer" letter from someone at work. I'm now talking to the police, yet again, because I'm a middle school teacher and suspect it was from one of my underage students. Nobody warned me about this when I became a teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 109

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Love Confused Money Sex Depression Health Anxiety Mental health Clothes Work Kids Alcohol Parenting Ironic Poopoo peepee Weddings Miscellaneous Birthday Cars Embarrassing Transportation Awkward Vacation Family Bodyshaming Divorce NSFW Students School Technology

The Top

Today, my job decided not to pay me. I talked to HR about it and they told me it will be “very hard” to fix the issue of my missing paycheck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 61

Today, the toilet at my apartment still hasn't been fixed. I have to straddle the bathtub for number 1's and go to Walmart for 2's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 343

You deserved it 3 253

Today, I learned the hard way how easy it is to get on my boss's bad side. We were talking about reality TV shows and I'd mentioned how much I despise Snooki, and how useless to the planet she is. Now I fear for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 266

You deserved it 6 378

Today, our town is so bored that the most entertainment we got was on the local buy and sell trade page, where someone posted that they got someone else's package in the mail, and everyone in town spent 6 hours trying to guess what was in the box. It was actually the highlight of most of our day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 210

Today, I was watching The Ring on TV in the early morning. When the scene where the girl is crawling out of the TV came on, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 754

You deserved it 8 486

Today, my dad went to urgent care because what all of us thought was a passing cold got worse. It wasn't a cold; it was that new vaccine-resistant flu variant, and neither he or I wore masks the day before when we had to go to my physical therapist. We were sitting right next to each other for at least 30 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 280

You deserved it 143