10

Peep These Comment Come-ups

By Nina / vendredi 30 juin 2017 11:00
Come check out this week's primo comments. We've got poop jokes, puns, and pop-culture references! What more could you ask for?

Hey there funkadelic soul children.

Before we kick off this round of superb comments, I'd like to make a blanket statement, and it is as follows: poop puns with the word "shitty" are not clever! Now, I love a good pun, and I love a good poop joke, I even love terrible jokes and terrible puns, but this one is far too easy. Enough already.

Now that that's been said, let's tear this mutha' up, why don't we? Time to get this hug fest rolling!

 

10. Tbh I only understand this reference because of my brother, but it was spot on, CrazyTrainWreck.

“Don't worry, the cake is a lie anyways.”

-CrazyTrainWreck

9. Oh, hello again, CrazyTrainWreck

“I'm gonna channel my inner most interesting man and say 'Stay thirsty my friends.'"

-CrazyTrainWreck

8. Know before you judge, isn't that right, Gngr_grl?

World

Today, I was alone in the house at night when I almost died of fright after seeing a woman staring at me through the window. I screamed before realizing that she was just my reflection. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 25 June 2017 21:00 / Venezuela - Barquisimeto

“Remember, your reflections are just as scared of you as you are of them.”

-Gngr_grl

7. SneezyBear shares a handy trick.

“they're not poisonous tho... just like scoop it out with the pool net”

-1337Carter

“Venomous. Remember: if it bites you and you die, it's venomous. If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If you bite each other and nobody dies, it's kinky.”

-SneezyBear

 

6. Close enough, GUSTI KOMANG ADI.

“yo i am feel sorry for you ?"

-GUSTI KOMANG ADI

 

5. This one's a double whammy because Lalala579121 and MidnaLink are right. Don't you ever learn from your mistakes, AkaiKitsune?! No more animals for you!

“This website is quickly turning from FML into 'FuckAkaiKitsune'sLife'”

-Lalala579121

“This is at least the third animal post you made, AkaiKitsune. You really should steer clear of wildlife of all kinds.”

-MidnaLink

 

4. Mentions of tacos almost count as cheating, RichardPencil. You know the way to my heart and onto the list.

“On the plus side, now you have room for another taco!”

-RichardPencil

 

3. I can just imagine you chuckling to yourself as you wrote this, Pamela Prothe.

“This week's best were hilarious. I especially love #2, although the #1 choice is classic!”

-Glowworm56

“Since you love #2, I hope you keep the plunger handy”

-Pamela Prothe

2. A triple mention goes out to Glowworm56, ArbiterofFML, and air5 because this issue hits close to home. I mean, I'm a taco. What am I supposed to do?

“That last one is a legitimate FML--what if you're a dinosaur?”

-Glowworm56

“what if you are an attack helicopter?”

-ArbiterofFML

“As if it'd kill you to be more inclusive? Have a heart, goddamn.”

-air5

1. Always with the clever comments, RichardPencil. Stop it, you.

World

Today, I played back the images of the tiny camera I attached to the collar of my cat to figure out where she goes when she disappears for several days at a time. I found my husband with another woman in our bed. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 29 June 2017 21:00 / Italy

“At least it's a great endorsement for the tiny camera company: 'Highly effective at tracking the comings and goings of pussy.'”

-RichardPencil

META COMMENT BONUS ROUND

I feel I ought to mention that not every meta comment will make it into this section. Your meta comment needs to make sense...not just mention another post. A little effort, folks.

Take a lesson from Glowworm56, for example.

“Well, now you definitely know where NOT to get a fork to take to work to eat your pasta with.”

-Glowworm56

Alrighty folks, that's all for this week! Keep the comment gold rolling in and I'll catch you on the flip side.

-Nina

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By  RichardPencil  |  22

Hahahaha! Sometimes I feel like I gotta take one for the team and add the obligatory "sounds like a shitty situation" comment to prevent anyone else from making it and feeling clever or unique. With some poop-related stories, that comment is so obvious, it hangs there like a dingleberry.

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  Nina  |  31

And you're right to be, that's why you made it on the list! You expressed yourself a little differently than Glowworm56 or ArbiterofFML but the idea is the same. I'm with all y'all.

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