It's Friday the 13th : to celebrate, here's 13 FMLs, superstitions... and black cats!
Don't be afraid…
Today, it's Friday the 13th, so we thought we'd celebrate the non-event, unproven myth around the luck factor (or lack of) with a smallish selection of FMLs and stories from around the world that induce fear into people. Poor them.
(Opening an umbrella inside is considered bad luck)
Weirdly, Friday the 13th has a lot of positive connotations and beliefs that the big lottery that day draw will earn them miliions, despite not having bought a ticket.
1 - I can't stand the rain
Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML
2 - The origins of the Friday the 13th myth
According to Wikipedia, the superstition surrounding this day may have arisen in the Middle Ages, "originating from the story of Jesus' last supper and crucifixion" in which there were 13 individuals present in the Upper Room on the 13th of Nisan Maundy Thursday, the night before his death on Good Friday. While there is evidence of both Friday and the number 13 being considered unlucky, there is no record of the two items being referred to as especially unlucky in conjunction before the 19th century
3 - Less superstition, mo' money
Today, someone gave me 13 dollar bills. I rejected one because I'm very superstitious about the unlucky 13. Later, I waited half an hour in the car for someone to bring me exactly 1 dollar because I did not have enough for the parking fee. FML
4 - Here are some of the Friday the 13th myths
- "If you cut your hair on Friday the 13th, someone in your family will die.
- If you come across a funeral procession, you'll be the next to die.
- Don't go on a trip on Friday the 13th or something bad will happen.
- If you break a mirror on Friday the 13th, you're in for 7 years of bad luck.
- A child born on Friday the 13th will be unlucky all its life.
- Ships that set sail on Friday the 13th will be unlucky.
- If you walk under a ladder or come across a black cat, you will be unlucky."
All of this is obviously highly scientific, and ISO9001 verified.
4 - Black cats are our friends
5 - Why the hysteria around black cats?
If they all mesured 6ft2 and could shoot lazers out of their nostrils, being scared of them would be understandable. But that's not at all the real reason. In Europe, under catholic domination, black cats were considered to be harbingers of the Devil. When you get up close and sniff cat pee, you could easily imagine that they're ALL harbingers of the Devil. The bad reputation black cats had crossed the atlantic ocean along with the witch hunts, the most famous being the Salem witches. At the beginning of the 20th century, the black cat is represented alongside witches on their broomsticks in childrens' books. Poor kitties.
5 - Another weird myth: horoscopes
Today, I realised that my friend hasn't spoken to me for a week. A week ago I politely explained to her that I really don't believe in horoscopes, and asked her at the time to stop systematically using my star-sign to explain my behaviour. FML
6 - How on earth did horoscopes become so popular?
We don't know. Just like black cats and Friday the 13th, they're superstitions, which have time and time again been disproven by simple tests. OK, they're fun to read in the back pages of a newspaper, but they should in no way be taken seriously. And certain heads of state have used the services of these… people before making a decision that could have an impact on a whole country.
(People who are into astrology often like shitty gifs)
7 - Is the horoscope for Friday the 13th even scarier? We don't know.
Today, I got fired for taking time off to see my sister in the hospital after she got in a car accident. Before I got fired, I found out my boss took time off because her horoscope said she should. FML
Thanks boss! See, horoscopes do ruin lives! The number 13 has a weird effect all around the world. In the US, a lot of skycrapers don't have a 13th floor, and the airline company Ryanair doesn't have a 13th row of seats.
(The seating arrangement in a Ryanair plane - no row 13)
8 - If you think you've got a sure fire way to make money, don't.
If you mix together Friday the 13th and horoscopes, some easily-influenced people thing that it's the perfect time to bet everything they've got, either at a Casino, on scratch-cards, hoping to get that big prize and change their lives for ever, or can think that the stars and dates have aligned to be the perfect day to proposition that cute neighbor down the hall. Don't do it people, it's not worth it. The statistics are against you, and you might get a slap in the face.
9 - Don't try to be rational!
Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML
10 - Believing in astrology, yet another reason to separate us from being at one with each other.
And not just putting people into boxes based on their date of birth. It can ruin relationships, work prospects (because, oddly enough, some bosses will hire you based on your star sign. I know, right?). So, if you have a job interview on Friday the 13th, there's probably a reason, an esoterical one. Open your Chakras real wide, be prepared to be surrounded by "healing crystals" and see loads of number 13s crossed out.
11 - Be careful
12 - Superstitions take precedent over trust
Some people will take homeopathy (which has been proven to contain absolutely nothing) instead of actual medecine. Some idiots are even worse, not vaccinating their kids because they "saw a video on YouTube by a moron in a kitchen." But don't choose horoscopes over cancer risks.
13 - Friday the 13th is also of course a movie franchise
Everyone knows Jason Voorhees, the hockey mask-sporting killer. It's thanks to these movies that the Friday the 13th tradition has been kept alive. Associating a date to a horror movie is surefire way to make a particular day scarier than the others amongst people who have a tendency to freak out at the slightest thing.
(The subway today)
To make it simple, whether it's Friday the 13th or not, some of you will get your FML moment. Don't freak out, there's enough to go around.
Do you feel concerned by these superstitions? Don't hesitate to let us know in the comments below.