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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, just before a job interview, I coughed so violently that I lost my voice. FML

#21421827
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23323) - you deserved it (1742)

On 06/06/2015 at 3:19pm - work - by WarMachine68 (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said "Never take a shit in this place! Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML

#21421640
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26077) - you deserved it (2354)

On 06/06/2015 at 3:32am - work - by justin bieber's nutsack (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I lost all of my male friends at work. Why? The new girl has my same interests and a prettier face. FML

#21421488
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27740) - you deserved it (2538)

On 06/05/2015 at 9:00pm - work - by cbarr98 - United States (Iowa)

Today, at work a customer bitched me out for not explicitly telling her that our peanut butter pancakes contain real peanut butter. She's threatening to sue because she's allergic to peanuts. FML

#21420888
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27569) - you deserved it (1803)

On 06/04/2015 at 9:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML

#21420435
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24607) - you deserved it (4903)

On 06/03/2015 at 9:59pm - work - by officeditz - United States (Florida)

Today, a customer yelled at me because the cherry pie he bought had cherries in it, and he wanted a refund. FML

#21419579
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26544) - you deserved it (1571)

On 06/02/2015 at 4:59am - work - by IrNatalie - United States (Arizona)

Today, the phone lines at work have been cutting out in the middle of calls. I'm a receptionist at an animal hospital. I now have less than two minutes to figure out what's wrong with a client's pet and how best to schedule them before I become "That rude bitch who hung up on me." FML

#21419304
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25791) - you deserved it (1929)

On 06/01/2015 at 6:46pm - work - by thankyouforcalling (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a customer complained that his earphones stopped properly functioning even though he bought them less than a month ago. After checking them, I realised that there was so much earwax caked into them that it affected the sound quality. FML

Today, on my second day as a lifeguard, I locked myself out of the pool. My angry guests and I had to wait for 45 minutes for my manager to arrive and unlock the gate. FML

#21417788
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23876) - you deserved it (5193)

On 05/29/2015 at 9:34pm - work - by explosivepeach - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was let go from my job, because I "progress too quickly and there's no promotions available" and I "can find a better place to work at". FML

#21416754
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28696) - you deserved it (1936)

On 05/27/2015 at 6:27pm - work - by smyp - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

#21416617
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36648) - you deserved it (3169)

On 05/27/2015 at 12:25pm - work - by UN4 (man) - United States

Today, I had to write my own notice for enforced redundancy because my boss just went on a two week vacation. He told me to just forge his signature and that, if I wouldn't do it, he'd just make something up to dismiss me on codes of conduct. FML

Today, my boss admitted she's having an affair. She's married to my brother. FML

#21415827
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29095) - you deserved it (1758)

On 05/25/2015 at 11:50pm - work - by tmi4me - United States



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