Today, I got a warning for not covering a shift, on my day off, for someone who didn't want to go to work. Apparently the next time I “do something wrong", I'll either get warned again or fired, whichever they feel like doing. FML

by I piss upon thee / 05/13/2016 at 2:35pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, at work, the shopping carts have coin locks on them so people put them back or don't go stealing them. A lady couldn't find a coin, so I unlocked one with my key and said to her, "It doesn't look like you will run off and steal it" as a joke. She replied, "I can't run darling, I have an artificial leg." FML

by TrolleyCollector / 05/13/2016 at 5:10am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I took my binder on a short road trip two hours away from my home, so that I could study for my upcoming finals. When I got home, I realized I that had left my binder all the way there, containing my notes, classwork, homework, finals notes, etc. FML

by Anonymous / 05/12/2016 at 11:46pm / United States (Idaho) / Work

Today, while stocking the green beans at work, I picked up a "leaf" which turned out to be a grasshopper. I screamed so loud, my coworkers now think I'm crazy. This is only my second week here. FML

by benz1369 / 05/12/2016 at 6:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I went to work expecting praise for working overtime last night after taking a client to the hospital. Instead, I got suspended without pay for working unapproved overtime. FML

by jackroarrr / 05/12/2016 at 1:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at work when a customer came up to me and asked where and what I used to get my tan. I'm Indian. FML

by shrutisoma / 05/12/2016 at 12:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, a customer came up to me with a can of ground black pepper and asked me what the ingredients were. FML

by belladonna1025 / 05/11/2016 at 2:49pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, the elderly lady I work for got mad at me, all because I wouldn't feed her imaginary friend. FML

by LoveTheElder / 05/10/2016 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, one of my students stole my wallet. I teach kindergarten. FML

by Annoyed / 05/10/2016 at 9:23pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, the canteen of the company I work for introduced a cash-less payment method to purchase food. To use it, employees must download the app, which is only available for iPhones. I have a BlackBerry. FML

by Katyness / 05/10/2016 at 4:20pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, a woman kindly asked if she might take a photo of her son in our cowboy boots. Thinking it couldn't do much harm, I agreed. Ten minutes later there was a butt naked three year-old and his entire family taking pictures in my shoe store. My manager wasn't impressed. FML

by jasonvanr / 05/10/2016 at 4:19am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work

Today, my coworker told me when we got to work that she purposely left her phone at home. I then had to suffer 8 hours of listening to her constantly whine like a toddler about how much she missed her phone. FML

by StephiLynn / 05/09/2016 at 12:33am / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I was helping a customer find some shoes. When I brought her a size, she got a phone call. I motioned to the shoes and mouthed, "Bigger size" so I didn't interrupt her. She yelled, "Give me a fucking minute," and stormed out. About 5 minutes later, I realized she'd stolen the shoes. FML

by Saxicolous / 05/08/2016 at 8:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.