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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, after finishing a three-page essay for my spanish class, I went to rip up my brainstorming paper in an act of triumph. After I finished ripping it up, I looked on my desk to see my brainstorming paper fully intact, and my essay torn into bits. FML

#5238031
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10855) - you deserved it (63252)

On 09/13/2009 at 9:00pm - work - by thissucks (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a promotion to management at work. My employer decided to give the 'non-management' employees a really nice raise. Which means the job I had before my promotion is now paying more than the job I have now. Did I just get demoted? FML

#5221967
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39220) - you deserved it (2204)

On 09/13/2009 at 2:12am - work - by ofcourse (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I accidentally left the tag on the new pants that I wore to work. Nobody had brought it to my attention for the whole day until finally, before I was about to go home, every single employee and my boss let me know by yelling in unison and laughing as I left the building. FML

#5217038
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28808) - you deserved it (7112)

On 09/12/2009 at 10:35pm - work - by Tagged (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I called the company with whom I had a job interview last week, which I thought went great, but hadn't heard back from. One of the interviewers claimed that I tried to grope her. FML

#5201164
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32994) - you deserved it (2826)

On 09/12/2009 at 2:32am - work - by badjob - United States (Oregon)

Today, I filled out an application at WalMart after being unable to find a job in three months. I just graduated from law school. With honors. FML

#5193582
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48425) - you deserved it (4531)

On 09/11/2009 at 8:10pm - work - by Thistle (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after picking up my 6 year old from school, he says, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me! I get home, look up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in Jr. High. FML

#5189179
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30045) - you deserved it (18106)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:11pm - work - by jeph23 (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friends took me out to the most expensive restaurant in town to celebrate my promotion, we ordered everything with expensive drinks too. They 'took a smoke break' and left me with the bill. FML

#5184573
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38183) - you deserved it (4419)

On 09/11/2009 at 7:57am - work - by howrude (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was leaving my job at a huge mall. I couldn't find my car anywhere, so I panicked and flagged a security officer. I cried while he drove me around for miles in the endless parking lot. Then, suddenly, I remembered. My friend had dropped me off in the morning. FML

#5166474
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8773) - you deserved it (51141)

On 09/10/2009 at 10:15am - work - by ritz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

#5163293
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38335) - you deserved it (6427)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:02am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, I was on my break when I had to use the bathroom. I was on the toilet taking a dump when the door latch loosened and the door swung open. The little girl standing there took one look and screamed. Security busted in. My pants were still down. FML

#5154574
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34614) - you deserved it (2559)

On 09/09/2009 at 7:30pm - work - by slashteddy (woman) - United States

Today, my boss fired me because a coworker had seen me reading magazines on the job. That same coworker was the one who offered me the magazine. FML

#5129906
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38434) - you deserved it (7133)

On 09/08/2009 at 4:48pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I got to work feeling slightly unwell. A couple of hours later, an extremely attractive customer came to my till, at which point my body decided it would be a good idea to vomit last night's dinner all over myself and the customer. FML

#5122980
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37696) - you deserved it (4275)

On 09/08/2009 at 5:07am - work - by h0308 (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

#5110537
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36410) - you deserved it (6174)

On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)



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