Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML

#16577754
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44659) - you deserved it (5782)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I started my new job at a restaurant. I am going to be the mascot that stands by the road to wave down customers in a heavy polyester animal suit. The high today is 102. I work 12-4. FML

#16575408
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35451) - you deserved it (6045)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:50am - work - by aeghw1s - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boss asked if he could pay me in guns. FML

#16571694
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32355) - you deserved it (5736)

On 06/09/2011 at 12:06am - work - by grant b - United States (Texas)

Today, after being laid off for over a year, I got turned down for an unpaid internship. I can't even get people to let me work for free. FML

#16561616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31226) - you deserved it (3240)

On 06/08/2011 at 12:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML

#16560118
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38202) - you deserved it (3323)

On 06/08/2011 at 9:03am - work - by iloveyoutoomom (man) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML

#16551400
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38331) - you deserved it (8035)

On 06/07/2011 at 8:13pm - work - by Bee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after spending thousands of dollars and several years pursuing a higher education so I could get a high paying job doing something that requires skill and brainpower, I finally got my first job offer after months of searching. I will be cleaning houses. FML

#16546066
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37209) - you deserved it (5475)

On 06/07/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by disappointed (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found out that if your boss deletes you off Facebook, it's probably not a good sign. FML

#16541885
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31289) - you deserved it (4201)

On 06/07/2011 at 2:48am - work - by IloveMaroon5 - United States (Texas)

Today, my mum was filling out a reference for me as I work in the family business. When it came to naming two of my strengths, she asked me what to put as she couldn't think of anything. FML

#16529159
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25948) - you deserved it (4424)

On 06/06/2011 at 12:01pm - work - by surefeelslikelove (woman) -

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

#16494046
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47182) - you deserved it (3496)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:15am - work - by zain - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss called me to his office, and played back a recording of me telling a co-worker that if I still worked there in a year, I would hang myself. He then bitched me out for unprofessional conduct. The taped conversation took place over a year ago, with my recently ex-boyfriend. FML

#16487802
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27205) - you deserved it (7304)

On 06/03/2011 at 7:23pm - work - by janice - United States

Today, I received an email from my potential employers at the zoo, saying that they won't be hiring me. This wouldn't be so bad if they didn't keep sending me the same email every two hours to remind me that I am still unemployed. FML

#16485621
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27704) - you deserved it (2479)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:22pm - work - by ryjacs - United States (Missouri)

Today, I received a phone call from my old boss asking me why I wasn't at work, to which I responded, "Because you fired me yesterday". He didn't say anything, and hung up. FML

#16480266
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39633) - you deserved it (3205)

On 06/03/2011 at 5:57am - work - by xmeatballx21 - United States (South Dakota)



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: