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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I received a phone call from my old boss asking me why I wasn't at work, to which I responded, "Because you fired me yesterday". He didn't say anything, and hung up. FML

#16480266
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38760) - you deserved it (3145)

On 06/03/2011 at 5:57am - work - by xmeatballx21 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

#16477855
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31030) - you deserved it (4021)

On 06/03/2011 at 12:47am - work - by whymyliferose - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got fired via text. The last sentence was, "Wish you the best, take care!" FML

#16476285
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26737) - you deserved it (2967)

On 06/02/2011 at 11:08pm - work - by amf (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

#16474774
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37554) - you deserved it (3002)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:44pm - work - by corn - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, a customer had an allergic reaction to the almonds in the sundae I made for her. We're supposed to put the almonds on unless the customer asks otherwise. She complained to my boss that I'd poisoned her. FML

#16462261
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32471) - you deserved it (3311)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:40am - work - by Unemployed (man) - United States

Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML

#16460145
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27395) - you deserved it (2505)

On 06/01/2011 at 10:48pm - work - by evomadrid24 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML

#16450721
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15012) - you deserved it (43219)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, while at work, a rather large woman came in and ordered a cheeseburger. When asking if she would like to supersize it, she took her purse, smacked me, and told me she wasn't fat, and how rude I was for calling her supersized. I was just doing my job. FML

#16430748
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41574) - you deserved it (4436)

On 05/31/2011 at 2:49am - work - by Me - United States (Arizona)

Today, it was the last day of school. My students shared what they thought of me. Expecting to hear wonderful things, all of their complaints can be summed up in a few words: I'm a liar, a killer of dreams, I need to grow up, and I was a big disappointment to them. I'm a first-year teacher. FML

#16425645
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29454) - you deserved it (13122)

On 05/30/2011 at 9:59pm - work - by sashimieater - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

#16408581
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10412) - you deserved it (44376)

On 05/29/2011 at 9:45pm - work - by milkymoo (woman) - Cyprus

Today, I got so stressed about my upcoming final exams that, in the silent section of the library, I had a panic attack and almost passed out. No one helped me. 3 people shushed me. FML

#16384054
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33163) - you deserved it (8924)

On 05/28/2011 at 8:20am - work - by justletitbeover (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I finally get to go home after a 16 day training event in Colorado. The plane has been sitting in the runway for over three hours due to lightning storms and we're not allowed to leave. We've spent more time on the ground waiting than the flight itself would take. FML

#16375097
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (2895)

On 05/27/2011 at 5:13pm - work - by Username - United States

Today, I went to hand in a job application, and the supervisor wanted to ask me a few questions. I was nervous so I kept touching the fabric on a nearby display table. Only after I left did my friend tell me it was a pantie display, and that I was fondling underwear. FML

#16369010
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25441) - you deserved it (8288)

On 05/27/2011 at 4:45am - work - by colebear - United States



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