Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML

by Sandman2015 / 01/29/2016 at 1:36pm / United States (Utah) / Work

Today, I got let go from my job, because my personal cell phone doesn't always have signal, so I missed an important call from work. My contract specifically said I'd get a work phone, which never happened. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2016 at 10:54am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I got call from the manager for a company I applied for. Turns out, he mixed up my friend's phone number with mine, since we applied on the same day, so the manager accidentally hired her instead of me. He said the position is still mine if I want it, but they will have to let her go. FML

by speaknoevil1 / 01/29/2016 at 1:03am / United States (Florida) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I started a new job. After being trained on several obscure computer programs I'm expected to use in just one day, my new boss informed me she's going on a week long vacation starting tomorrow. She's the only other person who knows how this program runs. FML

by screwedfortheweek / 01/28/2016 at 6:39pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I found out that I don't have to work tomorrow. Normally I would be thrilled to hear this, but not from the 6 o'clock news, doing a piece on my work's rat infestation and indefinite shut down. FML

by imahater07 / 01/28/2016 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I received a phone call from my boss, from the other side of the country. It seems the conference I sent him to is actually happening next week. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 9:44pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I took a swig of my Dr Pepper while having a meeting with my manager. As soon as I was about to swallow, I began coughing, and spat a whole mouthful all over her face. FML

by westwoodcosmo / 01/27/2016 at 5:35pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, a customer scared me for the sole purpose of watching my breasts jiggle when I jumped in surprise. I know because his head moved as they did, and he said, "Nice." before walking away. FML

by NotYourToy / 01/27/2016 at 2:59am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my boss got mad at me because I told her that I wouldn't be able to work two days out of the week, due to college classes. She then cut back my hours so much that I now only work one day a week. I got the job in the first place to pay for my college classes. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 12:41am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I walked into a room to help a patient get ready for bed. Except she already was in bed, with two other male patients. I work in a retirement home. FML

by Anonymous / 01/26/2016 at 5:22pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Work

Today, I requested a pay rise at work. They said they couldn't do it as they have to cut costs, so I resigned. They've now re-advertised my job for more money than I asked for. FML

by Anon / 01/26/2016 at 6:40am / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames) / Work

Today, I got fired from my job. When I asked why, all that was said to me was, "We don't have to disclose that information, but you did nothing wrong. It's just not working out." FML

by Kan23 / 01/25/2016 at 10:37pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Work

Today, my boss used our communal notebook to bitch out our entire department for not leaving a note notifying her that one of the machines was down. She wrote it on the same page as the note I left saying that one of the machines was down. FML

by Helpful Smile / 01/25/2016 at 9:56pm / United States (Iowa) / Work