Work: Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which...

By Anonymous - 11/02/2011 18:15 - United States

Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 854

You deserved it 3 828

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Same thing different taste

Mirror, mirror

By Anonymous - 21/08/2020 17:01 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today I discovered that I'm so pale that I can lighten up any distant dark corner of the room just by placing my hand by a window and reflecting the light like a mirror. Imagine how bright it would be if I stood by the window naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 235

Lava lamp

By Kathleen Verhaegen - 30/04/2020 20:00

Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 377

You deserved it 292

Mr Beard

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 16:59 - United States

Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 306

You deserved it 14 174

By anonymous - 24/09/2011 15:22 - United States

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 384

You deserved it 4 705

Lookin' good

By racoonface - 19/04/2009 15:17 - United States

Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 673

You deserved it 54 728

Nosferatu

By Kristache - 02/07/2009 08:31 - Canada

Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 288

You deserved it 16 388

By twoface_chick - 15/01/2015 07:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I have bad adult acne. This wouldn't be so bad, except that it's only on one side of my face. I look like a Batman villain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 220

You deserved it 2 679

By longday - 25/07/2010 06:13 - Canada

Today, I managed to multitask too much at work. I turned around, adjusted my glasses, swept hair out of my face, and blinked. In the process I walked into my manager, causing me to simultaneously punch myself in the mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 539

You deserved it 6 756

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 897

You deserved it 69 395

By Anonymous - 21/09/2015 17:47 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, when I woke up, one half of my face was smooth and clear and the other half looked as if I got slapped by the Hand of Puberty itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 890

You deserved it 1 870

honeybunches88 5

Friday 11 February 2011 23:55

Maybe you should turn your desk around and get the other side tanned up too :)

portablecupid 3

Saturday 12 February 2011 1:32

Or close the damn window? Maybe get some blinds? You can't get a tan through glass because it filters out UV light, so either the dumbass is leaving the window open or he's lying.

Comments

honeybunches88 5

Friday 11 February 2011 23:55

Maybe you should turn your desk around and get the other side tanned up too :)

prinzess_fml 25

Saturday 12 February 2011 0:26

or wear sun block

sweet_candy_ 17

Saturday 12 February 2011 0:27

or spray tan the other half :)

portablecupid 3

Saturday 12 February 2011 1:32

Or close the damn window? Maybe get some blinds? You can't get a tan through glass because it filters out UV light, so either the dumbass is leaving the window open or he's lying.