About The_zero_article
here, queer, ready to nap fuckboys beware
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The_zero_article's favorite FMLs

Today, I realised I hate my cat. She has 'stress incontinence', which involved her peeing all over my house. Last week I found out she'd been peeing on my stove, and I can't clean off the smell. Now whenever I try to cook some food, the kitchen is flooded with the scent of burning cat pee. FML

By NotEnoughCleaner - / Thursday 12 November 2009 17:30 / United Kingdom

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

By unashamed / Thursday 5 June 2014 08:11 / Australia - Ipswich

Today, my university considered it an "embarrassment" that I was going to be the first and only person to graduate from my engineering course, so they gave free passes to two guys who hadn't finished their thesis yet. They were congratulated in the newspaper; I wasn't. FML

By jlmed - / Monday 2 June 2014 23:10 / Colombia - Cali

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

By chevygirl51 / Wednesday 28 May 2014 21:12 / United States

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

By needanotherbed / Wednesday 28 May 2014 14:21 / United Kingdom - Ipswich