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  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
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  • Socialite

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  • I moderated this!

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  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

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  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

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    12%
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    23%
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  • One more and it's business time

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Razzazzster's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 18 June 2013 22:48 / United States - South Salem

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

By imarriedanaxemurderer - / Tuesday 18 June 2013 05:01 / United States - Joliet

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

By thatisfuckedup / Thursday 13 June 2013 22:12 / United Kingdom

Today, I started my new job as a cashier for a drugstore. As I scanned some children's medicine for a family, I gave the girl a tissue because her nose was running. Later, my boss sat me down and told me there had been a complaint about a "female pedo-employee". I'm the only woman working there. FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 18 June 2013 00:27 / United States - San Jose

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

By Anonymous - / Friday 14 June 2013 01:44 / United States - Stroudsburg