About Pennyprostitute
I love to sleep in late, I'm sarcastic (which often gets me into trouble), and I'm gay. Come chat some time, I like to make new friends. Hopefully we'll have something in common. Also, I'm not a prostitute! My cousin dared me to put this as a username because we have a sneaking suspicion that our great aunt is a lady of the evening, if you will.
Pennyprostitute - Followers
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Pennyprostitute's FML badges
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  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
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  • 100 kick-ass comments

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    4%
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    22%
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    24%
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    47%
  • 50 quality comments

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The list of badges to find
Pennyprostitute's favorite FMLs

Today, I was tailgated on the highway. There was a car in the lane next to me, and my tailgater was WAY too close to risk slowing down, so I sped up in order to switch lanes, which bumped me over the speed limit. That's when my tailgater turned on the flashing lights. FML

By cool trick buddy - / Sunday 1 January 2017 08:59 / United States - Atlanta

Today, after smoking, I sat down to watch Supernatural with my young cousin. I accidentally let out a burp during a demonic possession scene and, to our surprise, smoke came out of my mouth. Now there's a crying 11-year-old hiding somewhere in the house with salt. Mom will be home in 5 minutes. FML

By DemonicDummy - / Thursday 5 January 2017 05:06 /

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

By manderpander21 / Tuesday 17 March 2015 00:56 / United States - Bronx

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

By tulisa - / Saturday 21 February 2015 04:25 / United States - Alexandria

Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 21 February 2015 14:20 / United Kingdom - Birmingham