About Greenmonster68
I'm awesome
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  • Up and coming moderator

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  • The rules are the rules

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  • Happy ending

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  • Consolation prize

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  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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  • It's in the can!

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  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

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  • My diary is a collector's item

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  • I liked to the power of 20

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  • The return of the thumb

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  • The thumb strikes back

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  • Work is a 4-letter word

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  • Socialite

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  • 100 kick-ass comments

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  • A new thumb

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  • 50 quality comments

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  • 50 favorites

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  • Judgmental

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  • YDI Master

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  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    35%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    33%
  • Perfectionist

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  • I moderated this!

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  • One more and it's business time

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The list of badges to find
Greenmonster68's favorite FMLs

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

By skmusic - / Thursday 9 April 2009 05:04 / Canada

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

By Stop_HammerTime - / Monday 4 August 2014 13:51 / United Kingdom - Northwich

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I don't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

By Miami6and3 / Monday 26 August 2013 18:22 / United States - Pasadena

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

By fsfs - / Saturday 17 August 2013 16:27 / Germany - Kiel

Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML

By poopiter - / Saturday 27 July 2013 18:31 / United States - Grand Junction