This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By grossed out - 21/07/2016 13:21 - Denmark - Gentofte

Today, I was on a 6 hour flight between a guy I didn't know, who stunk of red wine and sweat and took up half my seat, and a girl I know, but don't like, who I'm pretty sure was masturbating the whole time under that little blanket of hers. I couldn't decide which way to lean. FML.
I agree, your life sucks 508
You deserved it 49

Top comments

Back. Lean back, put headphones in and try to forget

I'm pretty sure that you could have reported that girl for public indecency... Masturbating in public is definitely illegal in most countries.

Comments

Back. Lean back, put headphones in and try to forget

I'm pretty sure that you could have reported that girl for public indecency... Masturbating in public is definitely illegal in most countries.

But it's so hard to prove, especially with a girl who won't have a obvious raging boner. She'll just say she wasn't & you'll look like a sex-obsessed idiot.

I'm fairly certain that people with vaginas produce enough fluid during masturbation to cause noticeable staining, especially since she did so throughout the entire flight. That's putting aside other cues- scent, sweating, dilated pupils, increased respiration, flushed skin. It'd be a rather simple matter to tell her to remove the blanket from her lap, as well as within the power of the flight attendant to order such a thing. As for proving it- sexual fluid would likely soak through to her outer pants, and would certainly be on her hands.

I usually fall asleep on plane an my go to trick when there are annoying people is to sleep with my he'd on the chair in front. I know it sounds weird, and it looks weird, but you can stretch out your back, put the pillow against the seat in front of you and plant your forehead/top of your head against it. I sleep great when I do that. also you can just say really loudly, "Eew, you're touching yourself!"