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Friday 17 January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend took a day off from work because he felt "sick". I thought he might come see me since he hadn't come over in a while. Nope, he went to hang out with his ex instead. FML

#21031915
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51911) - you deserved it (5360)

On 01/18/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by yes i meant ex-boyfriend (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

#21028727
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51678) - you deserved it (8497)

On 01/15/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML

#21035329
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51594) - you deserved it (10157)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by MM - United States (Maine)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51420) - you deserved it (9636)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

#21033101
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50846) - you deserved it (7914)

On 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by Subliminal message (woman) - Switzerland

Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML

#21031087
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50605) - you deserved it (6399)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49791) - you deserved it (4501)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML

#21033078
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49151) - you deserved it (10051)

On 01/19/2014 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years told me that since I've proven my loyalty and faithfully stuck by his side, he has no reason to ever consider marrying me, because "It's not like you're going anywhere, honey." He seems not to understand why I am upset by this. FML

#21037274
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49148) - you deserved it (5136)

On 01/23/2014 at 3:57pm - love - by heartbrokenhaley - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a girl I've never met before came up to me and punched me in the face, because she wanted to get suspended. FML

#21036028
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48923) - you deserved it (3853)

On 01/22/2014 at 11:30am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after three weeks of fighting with my husband, I found out that he really didn't create an account on a website for cheaters and charge the bill to his credit card. Our daughter did it as a prank, and only confessed because our fighting was stressing her out. FML

#21031747
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48727) - you deserved it (5781)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

#21038727
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48288) - you deserved it (5350)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public she needs to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML

#21031501
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48009) - you deserved it (7067)

On 01/18/2014 at 4:45am - kids - by FattestUgliestPerson (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)



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