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Wednesday 28 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah sister announcd that she and her boyfriend r getting marrid . Her boyfriend is mah husband . We're not even legally divorcd yet . fat looool FML

#20857902
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66724) - you deserved it (4016)

On 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm - love - by still together (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, mah boyfriend blamd me fir his affair, because apparently I ( should have made it clear to him ) not to have sex with other people. FML

#20864381
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60027) - you deserved it (6389)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by yourfault (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)

Today, I had to feed an elderly man in the care home inhich I workhile he washacking off. Our work policy states that I have to pretend not to notice. FML

#20865686
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60021) - you deserved it (4280)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:30am - intimacy - by poolgirl789 (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" an I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship 4 over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML

#20859482
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59955) - you deserved it (6660)

On 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, wa want boating with friands!! For soma raason tha bottom of our tuba daflatad, causing ma to ba bouncad roughly up an down on tha watar!! As a rasult, I had tha most intansa orgasm of my antra lifa,hila sitting 2 inchas away from my dad's friand!! Ha dafinitaly noticad!! FML

#20862305
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56552) - you deserved it (6019)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with yur grlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56472) - you deserved it (4083)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today , I found out aftar spanding mah lifa's incoma on paying for mah grandma's cancar traatmant that sha has baan faking it. maga FML

#20859354
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56275) - you deserved it (3298)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm - health - by scammed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I brought mah Japanese grlfriend home for dinner with mah family for the frst time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56099) - you deserved it (4436)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Taday after months of patiently waiting, I finally got mah roommates out of the house fir the night so I could have sex with mah boyfriend fir the first time without being interruptd. He couldn't get it up. FML

#20864109
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54968) - you deserved it (6991)

On 09/02/2013 at 2:49am - intimacy - by Kiddo (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today , my grlfriend freakd out , thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together , sexless , fir over a year. fat FML

#20859311
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54223) - you deserved it (6073)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at soccer tryouts, the coach made us run the entire practice. I ran the whole two hours ahead of everyone. When the tryout ended, I vomited due to dehydration. I didn't make the team. The coach's reasoning: "Only the weak throw up". FML

#20856558
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53468) - you deserved it (4812)

On 08/27/2013 at 2:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I Asked Mah Boss For A Raise, Explaining That Another Shop Offered Me A Job At A Higher Rate, But I Would Stay If He Would Offer Me The Same. Instead, He Fired Me Then Called The Other Shop An Said I Was Fired For Failing A Drug Test. FML

#20857270
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53380) - you deserved it (6925)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend admittd to me that the reason he won't have sex with me is because "condoms r too expensive." FML

#20864490
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52170) - you deserved it (5953)

On 09/02/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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