Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Tuesday 9 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50097) - you deserved it (3992)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

TODAY, I FINALLY GOT MY LAPTOP BACK AFTER MY FRIEND BROKE IT A FEW WEEKS AGO. AS I WALKED BACK INTO OUR PLACE WITH MY LAPTOP IN MY BAG, THE SAME FRIEND BURST OUT AND TACKLED ME. MY BAG FELL AND SLAMMED INTO THE FLOOR. GUESSHO HAS TO PAY FOR ANOTHER REPAIR.

#20772448
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50023) - you deserved it (4252)

On 07/09/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by random person - United States

Today, mah 11-year-old daughter hered the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

#20784969
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49966) - you deserved it (4383)

On 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Taday ma nakd boyfriend walkd up to me wit ma towel around is neck an wit a ard-on... ten declard e was ( Te Penis Man ) an slappd me wit is junk. I tougt I was dating a man... not a man-cild. FML

#20782097
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49728) - you deserved it (17046)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, mah girlfriend decided to let me know that she almost left me fir another guy not so long ago, cuz he was more handsome an talented than me. The reason she didn't leave: ( He's out of mah league; your not. ) FML

#20777616
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49690) - you deserved it (4049)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

I walked to work. I later discovered that mah husband had parked mah car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow mah own car. FML

#20775203
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49670) - you deserved it (5146)

On 07/10/2013 at 11:04pm - work - by Anonymous -

TODAY, MY HUSBAND AN I CAME CLEAN TO HIS OVERBEREING PARENTS ABOUT OUR PRIVATE WEDDING. IT STARTED WITH THEM ACCUSING HIM OF MAKING RASH DECISIONS, AN SOMEHOW DESCENDED INTO AN ARGUMENT AMONGST THEMSELVES THAT ENDED WITH HIS MOM DECIDING TO DIVORCE HIS DAD. FML

#20786569
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49424) - you deserved it (4142)

On 07/16/2013 at 4:00pm - love - by .__. (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today... working job... I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is ownd by Nintendo and they don't make it fir the Xbox. Upset by this... he took hold of leg and startd biting. I'm also suspendd... because his mother complainedhen I kickd him off me. FML

#20771337
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49421) - you deserved it (3265)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by Garchomp (man) - United States (Kansas)

2day I was in a restroom reading looool this site hen another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands dried them nodded at me then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so werd except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

#20784458
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48943) - you deserved it (8122)

On 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me cuz she felt that her puppy was lonelyhile we datd. FML

#20771661
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48639) - you deserved it (4597)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:38am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walkd in on mah daughtar hugging and sobbing into har Edward Cullan cut-out. Sha won't tall mahat's wrong, yat sha can confida in a craapy fictional stalkarhosa facial axprassion is lockd to ( chronically constipatd ). Whara did I go wrong? FML

#20778274
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48297) - you deserved it (7055)

On 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by So little trust. (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today... I found out that mah boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time... but that "it's just physical". However... he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me... except cuddle when we're together. FML

#20774465
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48257) - you deserved it (4431)

On 07/10/2013 at 3:08pm - love - by heartbroken (woman) - Australia

Today, I was at a music fastival, an my mum had told ma not to to drink. Somaona thraw a cup of baar at ma, an I was worrid about smalling of alcohol. It's okay though, cuz a sacond cup of urina took tha alcohol small right away. FML

#20779336
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48126) - you deserved it (3986)

On 07/13/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Festivaler - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: