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Thursday 27 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came home from a long shift at work to find that my roommate had completely rearranged all of the furniture. Apparently the new arrangement is supposed to improve the feng shui of our apartment. My bed is in the living room. FML

#20760393
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39700) - you deserved it (2764)

On 07/02/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boss gave me an autographed photo of himself after he heard that I think he's intimidatingly attractive. FML

#20743881
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39533) - you deserved it (9054)

On 06/24/2013 at 1:20am - work - by myfavoritesgouda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I actually had to teach my 9-year-old brother how to pour himself a glass of milk, after he burst out in tears when my sister told him to do it himself. His astonishing ignorance also extends to basic hygiene. FML

#20763424
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39491) - you deserved it (4655)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

Today, I came back to my apartment after moving most of my stuff out. Upon returning, I learned that my now ex-roommate drank all of my alcohol and threw away my things, thinking that I had forgotten them. FML

#20764102
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38757) - you deserved it (3625)

On 07/04/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by uvagirl - United States

Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

#20751029
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38136) - you deserved it (3571)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by smh - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the stalker flatmate who has been obsessed with me since I first moved into the flat two years ago, graduated. Apparently he told everyone we are an item, because his parents and relatives were smiling and taking pictures of me from their seats two rows ahead of mine at the ceremony. FML

Today, I was once again handed a document to translate along with the comment "Good luck, it doesn't make sense to begin with." If my translation doesn't, though, I will not get paid. FML

#20759632
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38021) - you deserved it (2901)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:35am - work - by Demotivation (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I was doing a little victory jig after finally sending out the last of the invitation cards for my wedding when I realised that I had forgotten to put the date of the event on them. FML

#20749970
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37834) - you deserved it (21927)

On 06/27/2013 at 8:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, someone came into the store I work at, laughed at my name on my name-tag, and left without even buying anything. FML

#20747987
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37547) - you deserved it (3605)

On 06/26/2013 at 5:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

#20746764
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37027) - you deserved it (3152)

On 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm - misc - by mymomplucksbutthair (woman) - United States

Today, my shoe fell apart a few minutes after I got to work. I called my boyfriend and asked him to bring me the "pretty black pair" in my closet. What did he bring? Black stilettos. I'm a waitress with an eight hour shift. FML

#20756560
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36177) - you deserved it (30231)

On 06/30/2013 at 7:00pm - work - by readytoamputatemyfeet (woman) - United States (Florida)



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