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Thursday 27 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I received a lovely letter from the council telling me I have to cease the act of "breeding and selling cats" because someone from my Facebook reported me. I'm pretty sure I've never owned a cat or had one in my house. FML

#20764172
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40300) - you deserved it (2579)

On 07/04/2013 at 10:26pm - misc - by suspicious (woman) - United States

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

#20748752
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40292) - you deserved it (3566)

On 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm - misc - by MadMax - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was taking some clothes downstairs to wash, when my mum stopped me. She accused me of sleeping around and trying to hide something, since she did the washing yesterday. She made me admit in front of the whole family that I'd been "surprised" by a case of diarrhea. FML

#20761546
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40130) - you deserved it (2692)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:19pm - health - by ToiletTroubles (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML

#20747044
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39923) - you deserved it (4815)

On 06/25/2013 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my manager made me remove an Eiffel Tower ornament from one of my displays. Not because it didn't look good or match the theme, but because it was "disrespectful" to have it out on the 4th of July. FML

#20763233
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39748) - you deserved it (7553)

On 07/04/2013 at 9:13am - work - by unpatriotic (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39554) - you deserved it (5512)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my co-worker thought it would be funny to tell her husband that she cheated on him with me. I'm scared to death and I don't dare to go out by myself. FML

#20754723
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39437) - you deserved it (4040)

On 06/29/2013 at 6:19pm - misc - by unluckydude - Colombia (Boyaca)

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

#20757330
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39092) - you deserved it (4985)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:49am - work - by Neveragain (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML

#20758869
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38854) - you deserved it (3279)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:37pm - misc - by AwkwardPotato - United States (California)

Today, I finally realized that when my seemingly very judgmental fiancé makes negative comments about other women, it's actually just an excuse to keep ogling them. FML

#20761657
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38804) - you deserved it (5442)

On 07/03/2013 at 1:35pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow my laundry room key. He was bare-ass naked. When I refused to open the door, he tried to break it down. I had to call the police before he would leave. FML

Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML

#20749746
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38540) - you deserved it (3630)

On 06/27/2013 at 2:22am - work - by confusedbagel (woman) - United States (California)



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