Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Sunday 14 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was rear ended at McDonald's by the same driver who rear ended me at the same McDonald's last week. FML

#20607123
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51337) - you deserved it (7336)

On 04/20/2013 at 9:43am - misc - by dentedmercedes - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my dad I'm pregnant. His response? "It's only a phase, you'll get over it." FML

#20592767
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51052) - you deserved it (9914)

On 04/15/2013 at 2:04am - intimacy - by twinArmageddon2 - United States (California)

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50844) - you deserved it (8370)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, in my rush to do my hair and get to work, I managed to trip over my dog, hit my eye on the counter, and sprain my ankle. I arrived at work with a black eye and a painful limp. My boss didn't care, and fired me for showing up late. FML

#20609262
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50768) - you deserved it (6522)

On 04/21/2013 at 1:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

#20583013
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50464) - you deserved it (11400)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML

#20609750
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50143) - you deserved it (5416)

On 04/21/2013 at 9:33am - love - by jerk_ex_boyfriend - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML

#20602567
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49882) - you deserved it (3297)

On 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm - misc - by bhnja_ (man) - Philippines (Mandaue)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49864) - you deserved it (5801)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, it has been over 3 months since my housemates ended their 1 month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML

#20604478
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49262) - you deserved it (3830)

On 04/19/2013 at 7:44am - misc - by pleasekillme (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML

#20609675
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48498) - you deserved it (3294)

On 04/21/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by gamerguru13 - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

#20599244
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48448) - you deserved it (7993)

On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48104) - you deserved it (6309)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my "best friend" while I was away on vacation. She is now writing on her blog about how heartbreaking the whole situation is for her, and how she's "stuck in the middle of all this." FML

#20605576
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47366) - you deserved it (3217)

On 04/19/2013 at 5:50pm - misc - by sherrylynn (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: