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Sunday 29 March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my teacher took my test along with another student's and gave us both a zero. Why? Because we both have colds so when we breathe through our nose it makes a sniffle noise. She thought we were using a secret code to communicate by sniffling. FML

#21380083
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35151) - you deserved it (2204)

On 03/23/2015 at 11:43am - misc - by Mr. Sniffles - United States (Ohio)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34364) - you deserved it (2905)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my younger sister stopped talking to me. I got engaged to my boyfriend of 4 years and apparently, she's been in love with him since she met him. Through me. She's 12. FML

#21380050
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32835) - you deserved it (2457)

On 03/23/2015 at 10:24am - love - by twelvie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got fired for having a visible tattoo on my neck. The tattoo in question is a scar from a surgery I had 2 months ago. The same one paid for by my employer's insurance and missed 2 weeks of work for. FML

#21381191
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29464) - you deserved it (1812)

On 03/25/2015 at 8:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, an old lady was walking behind me. She tripped and started to fall, so naturally I turned and outstretched my arms to catch her, but was too late. A man turned just in time to see an old lady on the ground with me with my arms stretched out. I now have a black eye. FML

#21380543
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29040) - you deserved it (2152)

On 03/24/2015 at 2:58am - misc - by why me - United States (Georgia)

Today, after days of looking for it, I finally found the ring my boyfriend gave to me. It was on my roommate's finger. FML

#21381743
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28988) - you deserved it (2208)

On 03/26/2015 at 6:16am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

#21380308
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (2182)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:19pm - misc - by jumanji (man) -

Today, I caught my dad sneaking a drink of whiskey outside, shortly before my wedding. I asked if he was seriously getting drunk at a time like this. He looked at me and scoffed, "It's the only way I'm gonna get through this stupid shit." FML

#21381329
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28599) - you deserved it (3866)

On 03/25/2015 at 3:40pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend wrecked our car. Now I can't get to work in order to make the money we need to buy a new one. FML

#21380086
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28351) - you deserved it (3177)

On 03/23/2015 at 11:51am - money - by stuck - United States (Illinois)

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayne Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

#21381305
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28157) - you deserved it (4153)

On 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up and attacked my face. FML

#21379871
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27924) - you deserved it (3119)

On 03/23/2015 at 12:42am - animals - by birdsterrifyme - United States (Missouri)

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

#21381900
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27752) - you deserved it (2042)

On 03/26/2015 at 2:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband used the vacuum cleaner. Proud of him for this first-ever initiative, I congratulated him. His second initiative was to stick the nozzle on my ass, yelling, "Liposuction!" FML

#21380706
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27078) - you deserved it (4440) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/24/2015 at 8:58am - love - by chassezlenaturel (woman) - Belgium



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