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February 2016

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML

#21523681
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21211) - you deserved it (1612)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by OhDearGodGrandad (man) - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, at my minimum wage job, we received a half-way decomposed dog found in a lake. It was my job to tear open the bag and try to identify the breed and color. It would've been easier if the body wasn't crawling with maggots. FML

#21523219
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20870) - you deserved it (1597)

On 02/05/2016 at 10:24pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I heard some gossip at school about a weird kid who supposedly jerks off at every house he visits. They were talking about my brother. FML

#21522719
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20746) - you deserved it (1454)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:53am - intimacy - by concernedsis - United States (Georgia)

Today, after being told numerous times how sexist the East Coast is, I went ahead with my East Coast grad school architecture interview. The first thing out of the interviewer's mouth was, "Are you sure you don't want to do interior architecture?" FML

#21522710
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20718) - you deserved it (2636)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:13am - work - by LL (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend of three years and I went to visit my 85 year-old grandmother at the hospital. While I went to the restroom, she apparently told him about a guy I was seeing on the side. I have no idea who she's talking about and my boyfriend refuses to talk to me. FML

#21521929
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20702) - you deserved it (1371)

On 02/01/2016 at 10:23pm - love - by itsjustemcee - United States

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, which he was happy about, until I told him in the interest of fair play he also had to let me fuck him with a strap on. It didn't take him very long to suddenly decide anal is disgusting, with all kinds of health risks. And he thinks he's the smart one. FML

#21522856
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20604) - you deserved it (3097)

On 02/04/2016 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by sandra (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

#21522725
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20585) - you deserved it (1502)

On 02/04/2016 at 10:16am - animals - by uninvited (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to hide in the closet all morning because my 22-year-old boyfriend didn't want to admit to his parents that he had his girlfriend stay the night. FML

#21522776
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20525) - you deserved it (3435)

On 02/04/2016 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by doodlecrzyMeg (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML

#21522878
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20393) - you deserved it (1585)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML

#21523192
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20333) - you deserved it (2291)

On 02/05/2016 at 8:33pm - intimacy - by myusofwe (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, as my brother parked in our hotel's parking lot, I told him to be careful because the car wasn't straight. He retorted, "Yeah, just like you". My mother was in the back seat and heard everything. I hadn't come out yet. FML

#21523010
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20125) - you deserved it (2643)

On 02/05/2016 at 7:37am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, it's been five days since I started my new job in a new town, just signed a lease on my new apartment too. Now I find out the company's closing down, and since I'm still on probation, I'm told I'm not entitled to any kind of severance. FML

#21523276
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20082) - you deserved it (1656)

On 02/06/2016 at 1:28am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, Southwest officially called off the search for my lost baggage and asked me to file a claim for reimbursement. My bag had $2000 worth of dental instruments, which I won't get any compensation for since the airline doesn't take any liability for valuable items. FML

#21522618
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20094) - you deserved it (1717)

On 02/03/2016 at 11:47pm - misc - by InDebt (man) - United States (West Virginia)



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