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February 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after getting back from my interior design class, I told my husband that I learned the golden rule for home decor: "Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." He looked at me dead in the eyes, and didn't say a word. FML

#21068258
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36388) - you deserved it (6304)

On 02/22/2014 at 6:01am - misc - by housedoctor (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I was at the library, working with some classmates on our major semester project. I accidentally killed power to the row of computers by me. I've never had so many enraged faces looking at me before. FML

#21052823
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36282) - you deserved it (15369)

On 02/06/2014 at 10:07pm - work - by AnonymousQuagga - United States (Texas)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (12658)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, I was beating the hell out of one of the most useless employees ever. I mean really laying into him, all while telling him for the umpteenth time how to do his job right. Then my husband informed me I was hitting him in my sleep. FML

#21066977
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36013) - you deserved it (6891)

On 02/20/2014 at 9:31pm - work - by management - United States

Today, I was at work at the airport. I got called up to a plane's cargo hold, and thought I'd finally learn how to use the loader. Turns out they just needed me to weigh something down, effectively making me ballast. Then my boss told me to get the hell off, after which I hit my head hard climbing out. FML

#21063360
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36007) - you deserved it (4245)

On 02/17/2014 at 12:36pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I heard my sister talking to my mom about me, saying that I have the ability to suck the life out of a room like a Dementor. I walked in and asked what she meant by that. My mom replied, "She means you're an asshole." I love you too, mom. FML

#21055293
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (6351)

On 02/09/2014 at 12:00pm - misc - by jigglepuff - United States (Arizona)

Today, after 3 weeks of hard work, I finally finished painting my room. Apparently my 6-year-old brother thought I wasn't done and that he should help me out. I now have little red handprints all over my white walls. FML

#21063710
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35879) - you deserved it (4709)

On 02/17/2014 at 8:01pm - kids - by LittleArtist - United States (Alabama)

Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML

#21073990
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35178) - you deserved it (6597)

On 02/28/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by loserr (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my son set up a telescope in the attic not so he could study astronomy like he told me, but so he could spy on the girl across the street. FML

#21070645
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35029) - you deserved it (6603)

On 02/24/2014 at 7:51pm - kids - by sonwhy - United States (Illinois)

Today, my cat decided that instead of using the brand-new scratching post I bought him, he was going to use my pant leg while I was asleep. FML

#21070082
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34926) - you deserved it (3937)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:20am - animals - by tornkhakis - United States (Indiana)

Today, a customer at work pronounced the word "Asian" as "Ah-See-Awn" when ordering a salad. I wasn't allowed to say anything. FML

#21065187
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34788) - you deserved it (3861)

On 02/19/2014 at 1:24am - work - by PaneraSucks - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I performed in a rendition of Jesus Christ Superstar at my school. When it came time for my big solo, a whopping two lines, I forgot the words, making for an awkward eight seconds of silence. FML

Today, my sister finished a project about something she hates. Me. FML

#21069691
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34543) - you deserved it (3816)

On 02/23/2014 at 7:34pm - misc - by ninaaaa - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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