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November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML

#20946422
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44520) - you deserved it (10728)

On 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by roughsexgonewrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boss declared total bankruptcy of the company and I lost my job. The good news is my coworkers and I all received McDonald's 10%-off coupons. They expired in 2003. FML

#20963285
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44463) - you deserved it (2648)

On 11/19/2013 at 11:50am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I had to have a talk with my stalker. After telling him not to snapchat me, not to text me, and that I'm not interested, all he said was "I think persistence is going to be key here." FML

#20967638
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44410) - you deserved it (3551)

On 11/23/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by AshleyRose24 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44372) - you deserved it (8206)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I actually thought of faking my own death to get away from my girlfriend and her insane, overbearing family. FML

#20974597
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44367) - you deserved it (7252)

On 11/29/2013 at 10:37am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to pick up my little brother from his friend's house. When I got there, he ran off screaming that he didn't know me. His friend's parents believed him. FML

#20971159
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44339) - you deserved it (3074)

On 11/26/2013 at 8:07am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

#20972130
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44328) - you deserved it (2897)

On 11/27/2013 at 2:08am - animals - by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat - United States

Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML

#20966629
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44306) - you deserved it (7897)

On 11/22/2013 at 5:18am - love - by awkwardpaul - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I told my roommates they have to go get jobs, because I can't afford to support them or their bad habits any more. They responded by pawning all my DVDs for cash to buy cigarettes. FML

#20960170
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44134) - you deserved it (6818)

On 11/16/2013 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML

#20970235
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44066) - you deserved it (13222)

On 11/25/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me but wanted to make sure that we were still friends, so he could still use my Netflix. FML

#20963690
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44052) - you deserved it (3441)

On 11/19/2013 at 7:19pm - love - by unwantedforlife (woman) - United States

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

#20941322
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43992) - you deserved it (4101)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, I told the man my girlfriend has been cheating on me with all about her infidelity. He didn't get angry; he just said that he knew, that they were in an open relationship, and that I was pretty stupid to have not figured it out sooner. FML

#20941848
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43816) - you deserved it (5989)

On 11/01/2013 at 9:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)



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