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November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

#20951236
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45961) - you deserved it (3806)

On 11/09/2013 at 9:15am - work - by fmylyfe (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

#20955245
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45956) - you deserved it (3737)

On 11/12/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by long day - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized my wedding ring had fallen off while doing yard work the previous day. Luckily, I only worked in a few areas, so I had high hopes of finding it. That is until a storm came through, blew half a foot of leaves all over the property, and then froze them with sleet. FML

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45925) - you deserved it (4174)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML

#20960472
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45895) - you deserved it (14092)

On 11/17/2013 at 1:00am - misc - by LizGo - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

#20943397
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45807) - you deserved it (8139)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:34am - animals - by katchoo (woman) - Denmark

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

#20950354
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45807) - you deserved it (18844)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:02pm - intimacy - by notsogood - United States

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

#20955154
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45780) - you deserved it (2638)

On 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, while working at McDonald's, an angry customer called asking for his money back. Apparently we'd put 6 cheeseburgers in his bag instead of 5, he ate them all and now feels sick. FML

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45752) - you deserved it (8399)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45692) - you deserved it (6171)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

#20941234
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45605) - you deserved it (4123)

On 11/01/2013 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Champignon (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML

#20971142
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45511) - you deserved it (5666)

On 11/26/2013 at 7:17am - intimacy - by HaedLei (woman) - United States



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