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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, during parent/teacher conferences, my mom told my Chemistry teacher that I have an intense crush on him. There are still 7 months left in the school year. FML

#20930913
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49121) - you deserved it (5044)

On 10/23/2013 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, it was my first time having a make out session with my boyfriend. I got so nervous that a few minutes into it, I had to stop to take my inhaler. This happened twice more afterwards. FML

#20909145
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49075) - you deserved it (5347)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:20am - intimacy - by inhaler -.- - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom got drunk at our family reunion and told everyone how worried she is that my "excessive masturbation" would damage the nerves in both my dick and arm. FML

#20939123
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48963) - you deserved it (8357)

On 10/30/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by goodgrief (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter threw a tantrum in the middle of a store, all because I wouldn't buy her a pushup bra. FML

#20909114
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48735) - you deserved it (6891)

On 10/06/2013 at 12:44am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

#20912722
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48719) - you deserved it (7958)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML

#20921493
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48656) - you deserved it (5490)

On 10/15/2013 at 1:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after almost 2 days, I finally fell asleep, during my husband's vows, on our wedding day, in front of 250 guests. FML

#20917263
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48644) - you deserved it (11366)

On 10/12/2013 at 3:23am - love - by angryinlaws (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48547) - you deserved it (3995)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to one of the United States Mints since he enjoys coins. He looked at the money and seriously said, "I have such a hard on". He did. FML

#20905869
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48483) - you deserved it (5062)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:38am - intimacy - by EconM - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend at a dinner with our two families. Not only did she flatly reject me, my dad said, "Good call. He's not ready." FML

#20921216
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48468) - you deserved it (6332)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:49am - love - by notready (man) - Australia

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

#20927730
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48370) - you deserved it (3395)

On 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm - money - by oh... (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48350) - you deserved it (13154)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my boyfriend's dad said he'd given my boyfriend £100 to take me out for a meal last night and he hoped I'd enjoyed it. Last night my boyfriend and I went to pizza hut, shared a pizza and split the bill. Turns out my boyfriend had simply pocketed the money without telling anyone. FML

#20903132
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48301) - you deserved it (3813)

On 10/01/2013 at 8:32am - love - by hmmm (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)



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