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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came across some bubble wrap. Turned out it was a special type of bubble wrap that cannot be popped. FML

#20924315
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51874) - you deserved it (4718)

On 10/17/2013 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a ticket for speeding in a school zone. The school hasn't even been built yet. FML

#20905615
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51747) - you deserved it (9091)

On 10/03/2013 at 2:23am - money - by joecool3426 (man) - United States

Today, I realized I have erectile dysfunction while drunk, and premature ejaculation while sober. FML

#20932595
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51634) - you deserved it (6047)

On 10/24/2013 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, someone popped my birthday balloon at school. Her reasoning was that she "didn't want people to know we have the same birthday." Who popped it? My identical twin sister. FML

#20934033
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51409) - you deserved it (3557)

On 10/25/2013 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML

#20912417
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51178) - you deserved it (3134)

On 10/08/2013 at 12:30pm - misc - by she knows - United States (Hawaii)

Today, it was my first time having a make out session with my boyfriend. I got so nervous that a few minutes into it, I had to stop to take my inhaler. This happened twice more afterwards. FML

#20909145
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50776) - you deserved it (5523)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:20am - intimacy - by inhaler -.- - United States (Alabama)

Today, after holing myself up in my room for the day, I eventually turned my phone back on and told my girlfriend that my grandma passed away today. She replied, "Ask me if I fucking care," then accused me of not caring about our relationship because I went offline all day. FML

#20918838
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50770) - you deserved it (4708)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50753) - you deserved it (4587)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard my surgeon mutter to a nurse how easy it would be to kill me on the operating table and make it look like an accident. FML

#20940427
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50718) - you deserved it (3404)

On 10/31/2013 at 4:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50656) - you deserved it (3246)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I worked 24 hours straight fixing my company's servers. After it was over, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and promptly fell asleep at my desk. My boss found me an hour later, refused to listen to me, and fired me for sleeping on the job. FML

#20933214
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50623) - you deserved it (4490)

On 10/25/2013 at 5:01am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me over Facebook. Unfortunately, she "accidentally" posted it on my wall instead of sending me a message, so the whole world could see it. My mom liked her post. FML

#20939479
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50476) - you deserved it (3781)

On 10/30/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50472) - you deserved it (5704)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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