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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

#20927730
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47814) - you deserved it (3355)

On 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm - money - by oh... (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML

#20912417
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47777) - you deserved it (2859)

On 10/08/2013 at 12:30pm - misc - by she knows - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I realized I have erectile dysfunction while drunk, and premature ejaculation while sober. FML

#20932595
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47642) - you deserved it (5582)

On 10/24/2013 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

#20935170
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47639) - you deserved it (4302)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:11am - misc - by MsConfusedd (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

#20921212
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47461) - you deserved it (4408)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend's dad said he'd given my boyfriend £100 to take me out for a meal last night and he hoped I'd enjoyed it. Last night my boyfriend and I went to pizza hut, shared a pizza and split the bill. Turns out my boyfriend had simply pocketed the money without telling anyone. FML

#20903132
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47408) - you deserved it (3745)

On 10/01/2013 at 8:32am - love - by hmmm (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I called my dad to let him know some details for my wedding had changed. It would have been really nice if he had paused the porno I could clearly hear in the background. FML

#20921288
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47326) - you deserved it (3911)

On 10/15/2013 at 6:10am - intimacy - by hes (woman) - United States

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47223) - you deserved it (4460)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, after holing myself up in my room for the day, I eventually turned my phone back on and told my girlfriend that my grandma passed away today. She replied, "Ask me if I fucking care," then accused me of not caring about our relationship because I went offline all day. FML

#20918838
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47170) - you deserved it (4383)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, during parent/teacher conferences, my mom told my Chemistry teacher that I have an intense crush on him. There are still 7 months left in the school year. FML

#20930913
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47102) - you deserved it (4838)

On 10/23/2013 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML

#20905202
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47093) - you deserved it (5261)

On 10/02/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Sooz (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML

#20909568
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46989) - you deserved it (3641)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:13pm - misc - by D: (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML

#20922561
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46972) - you deserved it (6540)

On 10/16/2013 at 9:33am - kids - by TiredMum - United States (Washington)



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