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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML

#20665722
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50571) - you deserved it (3117)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:43pm - health - by LordCrafte (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML

#20657778
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50523) - you deserved it (4186)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:20am - health - by those_allergies - United States (Oregon)

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

#20660456
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50416) - you deserved it (9518)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50375) - you deserved it (4258)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50191) - you deserved it (3155)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain

Today, I received a note from my creepy ex, whom I broke up with two years ago, saying how much he still misses me. I live over 100 miles away from him now. The note was hand-delivered to my new address. FML

#20665723
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50123) - you deserved it (3468)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

#20681698
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50117) - you deserved it (2992)

On 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm - love - by a single fuck (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, the woman I babysat for blamed me for the cut on her son's face, and fired me with no pay for not looking after him properly. He already had the cut when I arrived. FML

#20652046
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50030) - you deserved it (3019)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:44pm - kids - by rachelllynne - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML

#20681249
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50023) - you deserved it (4659)

On 05/23/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML

#20671425
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49751) - you deserved it (7334)

On 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm - love - by SteroidPenguin (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend of two and a half years left me. To clear my head I decided to go for a drive. My car broke down on the way. The only mechanic I have ever used and trusted with my car is my boyfriend. Yes, I had to call him. FML

#20634352
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49705) - you deserved it (7904)

On 05/01/2013 at 4:21am - love - by brigie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I'm on holiday in Ghana. After having worn an anklet I bought here for the past two weeks, I was told that it's used by the local prostitutes to advertise their trade. FML

#20637157
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49656) - you deserved it (7631)

On 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

#20689621
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49611) - you deserved it (4355)

On 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm - work - by fuck you retail (woman) - United States (California)



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