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September 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my parents made me quit a school team that I absolutely loved, because women "aren't supposed to play sports." and were worried that if I stayed on the team, I'd develop a manly physique. FML

#21463369
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23598) - you deserved it (1513)

On 09/01/2015 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I dyed my hair purple. I came out of the salon and a little girl walked past and said, "Wow, you look like a mermaid!", to which her mother quickly said, "No she doesn't, she looks like her parents don't love her." FML

#21463092
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23293) - you deserved it (3897)

On 08/31/2015 at 6:50pm - kids - by laurencoc - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "5 more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML

#21463299
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23067) - you deserved it (2039)

On 09/01/2015 at 7:07am - health - by Dehydrated - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got fired from my childcare job of five years because the other staff weren't as popular with the kids, so they accused me of being "creepy" because the kids all wanted to play a game with me instead of them. FML

#21463241
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22057) - you deserved it (1171)

On 09/01/2015 at 12:40am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got a notice from the housing association, if I don't water my lawn I will be charged a $150 fine. Yet if I do water my lawn the city with charge me a $150 fine because of the drought. FML

#21463419
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19307) - you deserved it (1099)

On 09/01/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by really? - United States

Today, I had an argument with my boyfriend who was accusing me of only being in a relationship with him because I'd fantasised about being with an Asian. When I told him he was wrong, he asked me what attracted me to him in the first place. "Your eyes" was definitely the wrong answer. FML

#21463628
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19093) - you deserved it (4958) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/02/2015 at 12:21am - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss told me that the company will be hiring a programmer for our department. I had the idea for the position when we went over my 3-year career path last month, but it wasn't approved. I now get to look over résumés from other people applying for my dream job. FML

#21463347
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18717) - you deserved it (1174)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:30am - work - by Not a programmer yet (man) - United States (California)

Today, I invited an acquaintance over for tea. When he came in, I told him to make himself at home. He took it literally and now half of my pantry is messed up, my boyfriend's chocolate supply is gone, and I'm pretty sure our couch is broken. Thanks. FML

#21463240
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18652) - you deserved it (2841)

On 09/01/2015 at 12:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I went to the orthodontist, and found out when I was supposed to get my braces off. His exact words, "You'll get them off around Christmas... but we're not sure what year." FML

#21463569
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18015) - you deserved it (1226)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:55pm - health - by KenzoBVB - Canada

Today, I had to pull chunks of digested blanket out of my dog's ass because she refuses to listen to me when I tell her not to eat the damn blanket. I can't stop smelling it. FML

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

#21463707
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17642) - you deserved it (2923)

On 09/02/2015 at 11:26am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, some friends got upset with me as I wouldn't leave work early and cycle 12 miles to meet them to fix their punctures because they had no spare tubes or repair kits. The same friends that always mock me for being so prepared on bike rides. FML

#21463642
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17574) - you deserved it (1166)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my doctor informed me that the tests we've been doing the previous months show no sign of leukemia. I was just about to express my relief when he casually followed up with, "Never mind, there's still a lot of other blood-related diseases we need to look out for." FML

#21463645
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17382) - you deserved it (1019)

On 09/02/2015 at 6:09am - health - by Lily (woman) - Austria (Wien)



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