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Today, my boss gave me the job of dealing with the guys doing the roofing at our store. His reasoning is that since we're all Hispanic, I'm perfect for the job because "You guys all know each other." FML

#21397904
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28563) - you deserved it (2457)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:06am - work - by -_- (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

#5719624
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34816) - you deserved it (2456)

On 10/08/2009 at 9:31am - money - by wheatsnake (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I've now received my 73rd email in two days about my masters group project on policy recommendations for security reform. One group member has helpfully rewritten everything, and our project is now titled "Zeus's Earthly Kingdom." It's due today. FML

#19526549
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17901) - you deserved it (2456)

On 04/25/2012 at 9:25am - work - by IHateGroupProjects (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at work, when an elderly lady casually mentioned it was her birthday. I motioned two of my coworkers over, and we sang a little happy birthday to her over the phone. Our boss stormed in mid-song and suspended all three of us on the spot for "unprofessional behavior." FML

#20082592
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24870) - you deserved it (2456)

On 09/21/2012 at 8:28pm - work - by karmas a kunt (man) - United States

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33384) - you deserved it (2456)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while shopping, a lady came up to me and asked if she could borrow my baby because, "Y'know, I'm in a hurry and they'll let me checkout first." FML

#21297177
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33850) - you deserved it (2456)

On 11/11/2014 at 6:48pm - kids - by Anonymous - France

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

#8972575
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23029) - you deserved it (2455)

On 03/10/2010 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by robotchickens (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

#19484156
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37941) - you deserved it (2455)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

#20026361
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24329) - you deserved it (2455)

On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I stood for half an hour in the rain waiting for my bus. As I started to go inside, my bus turned around the corner and splashed water all over me. The bus driver wouldn't let me on the bus because I was soaking wet and I would "mess up the seats". FML

#4949959
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45054) - you deserved it (2454)

On 08/31/2009 at 9:05am - misc - by soaked (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML

#7086130
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45299) - you deserved it (2454)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:07pm - work - by manksy (woman) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, some thug tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves and told a cop that I did it. FML

#5911952
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53865) - you deserved it (2454)

On 10/20/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by BobbyHutchinson (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I arrived home to find I'd been broken in to. The culprit? An obese homeless man, who I found face down, unconscious, and surrounded by muesli bar wrappers in my pantry. He broke in, ate everything in sight, soiled himself, and passed out. The worst part? The cops don't even believe me. FML

#13771276
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32644) - you deserved it (2454)

On 11/08/2010 at 10:36pm - money - by Jen - Australia



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