Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML

Today, my boyfriend informed me via text message that he had moved to Bristol, and the reason he had ignored me the past fortnight was because he didn't know how to tell me. He knew he was moving even before we even got together. FML

#14058874
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25069) - you deserved it (2577)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:36am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, trying to be cute, my boyfriend threw a snowball at me. This would have been fine had it not been hard enough to break my glasses. As a college student, I have to choose between eating for the next two weeks or replacing them. FML

#14529233
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27660) - you deserved it (2577)

On 01/10/2011 at 2:09am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a lady come in to order a pizza. She wanted to use a free delivery coupon. After telling her several times that she couldn't use a free delivery coupon, unless she was having the pizza delivered, she told me I have horrible people skills. FML

#17728264
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28052) - you deserved it (2577)

On 09/12/2011 at 2:32pm - work - by pea - United States

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41801) - you deserved it (2577)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my roommate decided that because she has an oral report due, she's going to scream at the top of her lungs until she loses her voice to get out of it. It's been two hours and she refuses to stop. FML

#21252777
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39106) - you deserved it (2577)

On 09/06/2014 at 12:25am - misc - by why me? - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, like every day, I woke up at 3 in the morning because my roommate needs "a three hour warning" before his real alarm goes off. His alarm is a constant beeping noise which he always ignores for a good 10 minutes before finally getting up and turning it off. FML

#21338310
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28687) - you deserved it (2577)

On 01/16/2015 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for another girl, via a text message ending with "No hard feelings. Well xcept 4 my cock obvs. ;)" Fuck you, Rick. FML

#21365892
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34175) - you deserved it (2577)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML

#8122396
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18303) - you deserved it (2576)

On 02/11/2010 at 4:09am - intimacy - by stewiesclone - United States

Today, the sprinklers in the hotel room came on and stayed on. There was no fire. My family is currently living in the hotel, so everything we own is soaked. FML

#12410355
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27287) - you deserved it (2576)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the doctor's office for an appointment. After waiting for ages, I asked the receptionist what the delay was. Apparently, I had no standing appointment today. This is coming from the same receptionist who checked me in nearly two hours ago. FML

#14733317
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25661) - you deserved it (2576)

On 01/27/2011 at 4:31pm - work - by ihateoldmagazines (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friends happily announced that although they had been cut, they were still going to be playing on the school's volleyball team. The rumor going around is that everyone who tried out made the team. I never got a call back. FML

#17652760
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21771) - you deserved it (2576)

On 09/03/2011 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

#18222610
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28729) - you deserved it (2576)

On 11/11/2011 at 9:04pm - kids - by Username - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: