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Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me at all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

#19690417
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21912) - you deserved it (1559)

On 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by hitnmiss66 (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I woke up by inhaling a fly up my nose, and feeling it twitching and slowly dying inside my nasal cavity. FML

#20027750
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24074) - you deserved it (1558)

On 08/18/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by sneaky1324 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I fell going down the stairs and hit my head on the wall. My parents came frantically running to my side, but only to make sure I hadn't damaged the wall. FML

#19761942
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16161) - you deserved it (1557)

On 06/09/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Lily (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was ringing a lady up at the register. I noticed her son was doing the peepee dance, so I rushed the payment process up and handed her the receipt. The little boy says "Mommy" and the mom looks down, then back up at me saying, "Your problem now" and walks out. The boy peed on the floor. FML

#1309415
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46948) - you deserved it (1556)

On 04/25/2009 at 12:35am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I brought my girlfriend of six months over to meet my family. When my grandpa saw her, he said, "What a waste of good breeding stock." FML

#18236963
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18975) - you deserved it (1556)

On 11/13/2011 at 12:10pm - love - by mandie - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23086) - you deserved it (1556)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States

Today, my eight-year-old son thought that if he swallowed soap, his farts would smell like soap. The smell of vomit and diarrhea now permeating my house is proof of how wrong he was. FML

#19680165
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17749) - you deserved it (1556)

On 05/25/2012 at 8:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML

#20114686
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16205) - you deserved it (1556)

On 10/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that just because you express mail something, it doesn't mean the post office won't still lose it. What did they lose? My signed marriage license. We spent all that time and money to get married on the day of our choosing, and our marriage isn't even valid. FML

Today, when going to fill up the kettle, I noticed a bad smell and pieces of something coming out of the tap. Turns out there was a dead snake in my water supply. FML

#6065888
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30314) - you deserved it (1555)

On 10/30/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by seriousdubsteplover (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered my employer is advertising for a contractor position within my team performing basically the same role as myself. Except the pay is seven times more. FML

#8815543
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19126) - you deserved it (1557)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:30am - work - by YankeeDoodle (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked out and saw four kids mercilessly keying my car. When I questioned them on it, they said "Oh, that was your car? Oh well at least we didn't pee on your door handles too." FML

#19079229
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21238) - you deserved it (1554)

On 02/14/2012 at 8:28pm - kids - by MC Turtledick - United States (Washington)



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