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Today, after weeks, I've finally reached my goal and lost 10 lbs. My sister got jealous about me losing weight, and told my parents and coworkers that I'm anorexic. Hello, intervention. FML

#16931515
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34227) - you deserved it (2738)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:56am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

#19548071
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27391) - you deserved it (2738)

On 04/29/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by davincourt (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML

#20720351
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43083) - you deserved it (2738)

On 06/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Elephant1718 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boss drove past me while I was walking to work, and splashing mud over my uniform. When I got to work, he criticized me for showing up in unpresentable condition. FML

#21281679
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37485) - you deserved it (2738)

On 10/20/2014 at 11:03am - work - by Chansus10 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML

#17355075
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26289) - you deserved it (2737)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by doomeddaddy - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband told me he cheated on me two years ago with his ex-fiancée. In the process, he got her pregnant, but said it was okay, because she didn't keep it. FML

#21284646
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39677) - you deserved it (2737)

On 10/24/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into Jamba Juice like I do every day. I decided to order something different than I usually do, and was flattered when the cashier recognized me. Then he switched places with another employee, and from the back room I hear "Hey, ugly's back again." FML

#7426136
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29153) - you deserved it (2736)

On 01/18/2010 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, we ordered pizza. A long wait and several phone calls later, we found out that someone met the delivery person at the end of our driveway, signed our receipt, and stole our pizza. Way to check the credit card pizza people. FML

#14690774
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27524) - you deserved it (2736)

On 01/23/2011 at 9:06pm - money - by deepblue (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I sat on the kitchen counter in my boxers for ten minutes running my feet under hot water. Why? Because my dad thought it would be funny to superglue my feet together. FML

#18491637
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29566) - you deserved it (2736)

On 12/12/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by lucas - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boyfriend came over for a family brunch, during which he told my mother, in vivid detail, how he gets the shits whenever he eats kale chips. FML

#20483441
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23045) - you deserved it (2736)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:02pm - health - by shitty situation - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the stalker flatmate who has been obsessed with me since I first moved into the flat two years ago, graduated. Apparently he told everyone we are an item, because his parents and relatives were smiling and taking pictures of me from their seats two rows ahead of mine at the ceremony. FML

Today, I had my first date in almost four years. Twenty minutes into our dinner date, I excused myself to use the ladies room. When I came back, not only was he gone, but there was also a security guard waiting to walk me out. I still have no clue why he left or why I got kicked out. FML

#20869864
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45571) - you deserved it (2736)

On 09/06/2013 at 2:42am - love - by thissinglelife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my coworker asked to borrow my nail clippers so he could take care of a hangnail. He went to the bathroom, which I thought was polite, but when he got back to his desk and returned my clippers, there were little curly hairs stuck inside. He's bald. FML

#6695402
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31200) - you deserved it (2735)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:41pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (Indiana)



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